pffft no one is stopping you from self service..... I do not see a problem in helping yourself out in any stable marriage or relationship.

there's marvelous toys on the market

Yeeep. But it's starting to even out. And DH makes up for it by buying me "toys" because he feels bad about not being able to perform as much as I'd like. But he seems to be doing better when he feels no pressure, so the more I leave him alone, the more he wants it.

ExDH and I weren't evenly matched when we got together. His drive decreased and mine never changed. It was definitely a factor in our divorce.

SO's drive is stronger then mine . He believes in service first. I love it. Definitely keeps him on my good side.

From the this male's perspective, sexdrive is effected by a lot more for men than a lot realize and it depends on the man in question as well.

Not just physical health issues but also outside and inside stressors can lower the drive.

Men also have a monthly cycle where testosterone is higher during one point of the month and lower during another, we manstrate lol .

Some men are very visual , some auditory, some tactile, etc etc etc.

Just like you mysterious women, we can be rather complicated as well.

DW and I don't have sex as often as either of us would like and it's both our faults for that, excuses come easy when the drive is low even though the desire for a high drive is still there.

For me personally, I am usually the initiator and have mentioned on more than one occasion that I would like DW to initiate but alas she still has not, she might flirt with me or make a comment but never goes through the act of saying, let's have sex !!!!! Now she says that is because she never knows how I am feeling, lame excuse in my book, I never know till I bring up the subject how she is feeling. So I am left with wondering if there is something wrong with me, her, us etc etc etc.

Told you we were complicated. :?

If not inappropriate I will throw in a man-spective. Or at least my man-spective.

My bride and I have traded off having the higher sex drive several times during the course of our 22+ year marriage. We were 18 and 29 respectively when we met and started dating, and 18 and 30 when we married. I will be 53 in a few weeks and she will have been 41 for 6mos when I have my upcoming birthday.

Interestingly the alignment of our sex drives has been fairly closely correlated to where we each are on our weight cycle.

I am 6’1” and was 180lbs when we met and she is 5’10” and was 125lb. We both were up about 10lbs from there when we married. She peaked about 8yrs ago having put on 100lbs and is down 50lbs from her peak. I am at my highest weight ever at 290 having put on 110. She went up much more quickly than I did over the first dozen years then I took over. She made a huge commitment to fitness in 2009 and I have yet to make that commitment.

Someone mentioned medical conditions and medications. Yep, all of those have impact on middle aged and older men. Though I am a 36+ year T-1 diabetic stuff still works fine though I am past the hanging a towel on it stage I was in in my late teens through my 20s and into my latish 30s. At least hanging a towl on it for very long. For me… my “little blue pill” is the laugh of my amazingly hot bride. No need to actually use any “little blue pills”…. Yet. When that day arrives I do not see any issue with adopting that solution if or when necessary.

We have only had one notable disconnect in sex drive over the 23 years we have been lovers and that was about 9 years ago. I thought things were fine, she was not happy. I have always found her to be incredible sexy regardless of her weight.

It took her a while to share her frustrations and upon that communication I adjusted my game and we got in synch in a hurry. Other than that 9mo or so period we have usually had a rockin sex life that we have both very much enjoyed . However, we are at a mini crisis now due to my weight and it is mainly that it is a comfort issue for her. Our geometry alignment is off from our usual very enjoyable norm.

So, I have some work to do on my commitment to not only my own health and fitness but to our life together as lovers. Okay, enough of the barring of my soul.

The key to our sex life is communication and since the disconnect 9yrs ago we do not let any misalignment go uncommunicated. Mostly our communications are flirty and fun. Always lots of passionate laughter. Communication and laughter minimizes any disconnects.

We cycle on frequency over a 6-12mo cycle. We will have periods of 1-2 times per day for a number of weeks, reducing to several times per week, reducing from there to half a dozen or so times per month, then cycling back up the scale. We trade off on initiating during that cycle. Sometimes I am the primary and more frequent initiator, other times she is.

Toys and self-service are certainly part of our repertoire.

That just about covers it…. I think.

Get his testosterone levels checked and try him on Zinc supplements

that's the case when it's high time for consulting with the specialist and probably taking viagra as a treatment. It may seem strange, however it actually works. I've done my treatment and now I am feeling like a PERSON. However, I haven't taken viagra itself, it was cialis due to which I became normal again. I've got it from https://indegenerique.fr/generique-cialis/ and I really enjoyed their servicing. If you still need help with it, I'm here to give some advice and suggest a reliable source of pills.

i give my husband viagra

sometimes honey with nuts

When you are married and are with someone for a short time or long time things happend in a marriage that chagne the sex life drastically. I have been with DH for 5 years in January and the first year we had sex alot a couple times a day when we would see one another. When we moved in together it was a couple times a week. We would make a plan early in the day so we both knew to be ready. Lets face it there is a kid in the house 24/7 which clearly makes things more difficult.

When we started trying to have a baby it became a little more technical with timing and everything. Once I got pregnant things went very downhill. It is what it is at times. They make things for women and men alike to aid themselves. Try that and be happy.

Both SO and I are in our 40's. I have a very high sex drive and SO does not. It has nothing to do with age. I think stress level is definitely a factor, but the biggest problem is he doesn't exercise and has very poor eating habits. Our lack of a sex life was really starting to become a problem for me.

Because I cant really do anything to make him change that, he has to want to do it for himself. I did my research and have gotten him to start taking supplements. I did not tell him why, because it's a sensitive subject for him. So I didn't lie, just left some info out and only told him it will give him more energy and help with aches and pains. He takes l -carnitine an amino acid which is naturally produced in the body. Let me tell you the results were almost immediate in my case. I think he eventually caught on because he started referring to them as his " boner pills".