You are here

ready to give up....

longroadahead's picture

new here...looking for advice! I'm dealing with a soon to be stepdaughter that i"m ready to give up on

longroadahead's picture

after a very very long year; she's very manipulative, borderline bi-polar in my eyes. She is using drugs, she lies, she steals. Her dad falls into her BS only because i think he feels guilty about the past.

longroadahead's picture

ugh< she turned 18 in june and i just came into the scene alittle more than a year ago. She was an absolute mess when i met her. Her mother moved to cananda and left her and her brother with a dad that they didnt have a very good relationship with. I have done everything in my power to help her, i felt bad for her.

MaGoose2010's picture

Been there, done that! (Not the drugs tho')

Is she working, studying? Why is she still at home?

If you have done everything you can for her and she is still acting this way, then perhaps you need to disengage and let your hubby deal with her - she's not your responsibility.

Just IMHO (in my humble opinion)
MG

longroadahead's picture

she works 2 days a week and goes to college 2 days (of which I paid for). She disassociates herself with us as a family but turns it on me saying.. i can have her dad and her BM's house only because for the first time in her life...dad is trying to stand up to her. She's financially dependent on us yet she takes no responsibilty for her actions

MaGoose2010's picture

She is actually very lucky to have you as a SM (step mom) in her life. Looks like she has the same loser-mentality that my Skids have!

I am not really qualified to give much advice on the subject of adult skids still living at home (my 1st have left - not without their own drama & still 2 to go in about 8 years), but I can tell you that from my experience, if they don't contribute financially to the household and pull their weight, they should be given an ultimatum to do so, or move out.

You will find plenty of other posters on this site who have similar situations to yours and there are people on this site who give brilliant advice.

Good luck, hang in there, and use this site to get things off your chest. Vent away! It really does help to extinguish the 'flames' - you sound like a strong woman! Keep strong.

MG