SS15 seems to be distancing himself from me
I have been in my SS15 life since he was 10. We always had good relationship and after I moved in with them over a year ago we began getting even closer. Lately he would hug me goodnight often and even a few times said "I Love you" to me. I never wanted to push myself on SO's kids so I have followed their lead for the most part regarding affection.
Recently SS15 stopped saying goodnight to both of us, just disappears in his room, staying there until next morning. This is very unlike the sensitive sweet kid I have known. Along with this, I no longer get hugs from him (I let him initiate as I never want to make him feel he is forced to so I very rarely initiated myself). After SS15 initiated a few "I love yous" he stopped. However even though he no longer says good night to me and his father, he still always tells his dad he loves him many times a day.
In the back of my mind I am concerned he has adopted his adult sister's attitude towards me (she was the SD from hell, resenting my existence and having to share Daddy). Part of me wants to talk to SS15 to see why he said he loved me a few times but no longer does that (hoping to find out if I did something bad I didn't realize or if he was hoping I would say "I love you" first).
Is that a bad idea? Should I just ignore it? FYI...his dad is planning to ask him why he stopped saying good night to us at some point because that does bother my SO some.
He's 15. It's called being a
He's 15. It's called being a teenager and puberty. I was also involved with my SS15 since he was 10. I swear when he turned 13, his head spun around and he contracted the evils.
Teenagers are the worst. Unfortunately I think it's very normal. They are strange, miserable beasts!
While I did think about that
While I did think about that on one hand, he still tells his father he loves him. Just not me. So I'm concerned it's more specific to his feelings towards me and he is now resenting me as a step parent for some reason.
Did your SS treat only you differently? or both you and your DH differently? To me that is the difference in that basically I am treated with less affection than in the recent past.
My SD15 started doing this
My SD15 started doing this same thing to me, starting when she was 13. She just suddenly distanced herself from me and even became straight-up hostile toward me. I was a full-time SM to her since she was 5. I remember it being a surreal feeling to suddenly realize that I was and always will be disposable to her.
I love the previous comment:
"Disengage.
I’m afraid you’ve found out the hard way that step parenting is a bad investment of time, energy and money."
pffft it's normal, hormones
pffft it's normal, hormones kicking in, nothing to worry about, simply respect his wishes and disengage, if he talks to you and he's friendly you are friendly back, if he's rude you ignore him...
yes he will be different to his father cause it's his father, and being in his life for 5 years does not count anything, dang you are not the mother you never will be, you still will not matter even if you where in his life for 50 years... that's just the way it is.