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Tug of War...

baileyscave's picture

Submitted by baileyscave on Fri, 01/02/2015 - 8:30am

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General Discussion

What happens to these kids who are at a tug of war between biological mom and biological dad. They are always fighting to get "more" time with their kids, but the quality doesn't seem there. They want to never make the kid feel "unwanted", but then it seems the kids get cocky and arrogant about it. I don't see a good future for kids that are treated this way. Any insight? What happens when these kids enter real life? Any stories to share?

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Fri, 01/02/2015 - 10:38am

I have seen it change who my SS and SD are. One is very introverted and the other is a drama seeking wreck. After the divorce they had 50/50 and neither kid was ever encouraged or admonished. Both parents felt guilty. It changed who these kids could have been.

MissElphaba's picture

Submitted by MissElphaba on Fri, 01/02/2015 - 12:07pm

Sometimes I think they play tug-of-war just to win... it's not always all about the best interest of the kid for them. That seems to be the case for a lot of BMs mentioned on this site...they're so hung up on winning...they forget that the child always loses. Long term? I'm sure they get a pretty screwed up idea about love and I'm sure they don't feel support.