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Out of the house

moonchild18's picture

Submitted by moonchild18 on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 6:32pm

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Adult Stepchildren

SS is finally out of the house yeah!!!!! Smile For now anyways. I have not been on here for a little while. I ended up in the hospital with kidney failure and had to get my appendix removed. I blame some of my illness on all the stress here. SS 32 years old, a alcoholic and totally disrespects my home. And me and DH. So glad he is out. My concern is: DH is a alcoholic and with the holidays he will feel guilty his son was put out. I know I will be blamed too. How do you handle "Guilty Daddy Syndrome"? I know it's coming---I've dealt with it before.

moonchild18's picture

Submitted by moonchild18 on Fri, 12/06/2013 - 8:35am

I wish it was that easy. Even without the alcohol, he will feel guilty about his son. Always has---that is why the SS has gotten away with so much.

Amber Miller's picture

Submitted by Amber Miller on Fri, 12/06/2013 - 10:03am

Alcohol can make people more depressed and emotional in some cases (everyone is different). If your DH has issues with alcohol, I would suggest that he tackle this obstacle/addiction first; then he will be able to think more clearly and make better decisions. I don't have any good advice about the guilty daddy syndrome even though I saw my husband struggle with it for 8 years. I really wish I could be more helpful but I think if your DH drinks too much it is only going to amplify his sense of guilt.

moonchild18's picture

Submitted by moonchild18 on Fri, 12/06/2013 - 12:43pm

Yes, alcohol certainly makes you more emotional. Sad With the holidays coming up that will add to it. DH will not quit drinking. He will always drink. I will not convince him not to. I can't. I can only worry about myself right now. I just got out of the hospital not too long ago. I know a lot of my health issues are from living in this environment. Looking for a job now. Trying to get my ducks in a row. Just need a few tips on how to cope in the meantime. At least SS is out of my house. There was no peace here.

Amber Miller's picture

Submitted by Amber Miller on Fri, 12/06/2013 - 5:45pm

Please take care of yourself. Kidney failure sounds serious. I hope you continue to regain your health.

moonchild18's picture

Submitted by moonchild18 on Fri, 12/06/2013 - 7:33pm

Thanks for your concern Amber. It is greatly appreciated. Yes, I was so run down, that my body was starting to shut down. I just pray for strength to get through all of this. I just want a life of some peace and happiness. Please pray for me, and I will do the same for all of you.

Amber Miller's picture

Submitted by Amber Miller on Sat, 12/07/2013 - 2:34pm

Hi Moonchild. You're welcome Smile I hope you are having a good day today. I know the havoc these adult demons can exercise on our families. Stress definitely makes the body weaker. I know as princess satan stayed here with her baby for 2 weeks one time. I had just had 2 rounds of chemo and infusions the week before they arrived. I had to deal with her narcissistic BM calling me every day to get a report on her darling precious daughter and grandchild. After she left, I got hit with a horrible flu, high fever, bad dry cough, too weak to even hold up a glass of water to my mouth. I thought I was going to end up in the hospital and my DH thought I was septic. We think that this happened due the stress BM and SD put me through. She's not an attentive mother and I had to take care of the baby. She'd only feed him peanut butter sandwiches and water. One day she fed him 3 sandwiches within a couple hours (did I mention he's extremely overweight and she thinks it's cute to have a fat 2.5 year old who can't walk/talk). He choked and threw up as she shoved the sandwich down his throat (I am not being dramatic). Well, this is another story best saved for another thread. You take care and continue to get better and yes, you will be in my thoughts and I will send a "shout out" to the higher powers that be to send you positive energy.

moonchild18's picture

Submitted by moonchild18 on Sat, 12/07/2013 - 8:00pm

Well, you don't need any else's problems that's for sure. Sorry to know that you are ill. I hope you are doing better. Shoving a peanut butter sandwich down the toddler's throat? Wow!!! I would worry about a allergic reaction at that age. That poor child. Why isn't BM taking care of the grandchild?

So far, with SS gone it has been peaceful. None of his ignorant behavior to tolerate. I don't know how I put up with it so long. No one is worth all of the trouble he caused.

Take care Amber. I will be sure to include you in my prayers tonight. Sleep well.

Amber Miller's picture

Submitted by Amber Miller on Sat, 12/07/2013 - 10:34pm

Thank you for your kind words. I'm hanging in there but my body isn't cooperating. I appreciate what you said though. Yes, BM helps with the baby but she is blind to her daughters inability to be a good mother. SD told DH and I that she never wants to see us or speak to us ever again as a result of a tantrum she had. Our hands are tied. We did everything we could to help. It was nice talking to you. Take care