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SD's Birthday

20YearsAsAStep-Mom's picture

It is Sd's birthday this week. When she called DH last week she said she didn't have time to talk, only wanted to talk to her daddy.

Do I call, text or do nothing to acknowledge her birthday?

cmwolfe1264's picture

Do nothing!! I have not acknowledged SDs birthdays for the past 10 years or so. They do not acknowledge mine, even to my face, while their children are hugging me and telling me Happy Birthday so why would I acknowledge theirs? Birthday have always been important to me and in my family but in DH's family they are not happy occasions so I gave up trying to make each of theirs a special day. If I do nothing than I'm not disappointed when they don't acknowledge whatever nice thing I do or say on their birthday anyway.

Freshstart's picture

I cannot help myself from doing and buying something. Not saying do as I do though. If she is rude enough to not even have a quick pleasant chat to you about it then you, like me, are really wasting your time.

In a similar situation I responded to an email from SD re her Birthday offering her a few nice options of what to do. She ofcourse did not respond but played hard to get until her dad caved and called her. Ho hum.

Time wasted. Here's an idea. Go shopping for you and then spend 5 minutes max picking a card. A compromise!

sandye21's picture

Does she acknowledge your Birthday? In the beginning of our marriage I would go to a lot of trouble finding the perfect card for SD. She never said Happy Birthday to me, and even got angry when DH did. Think of it this way: By not observing her birthday, you are doing her a favor by taking away the obligation to reciprocate when it's yours.

IslandGal's picture

Screw that - if she is rude to you and is showing you attitude, then I wouldn't bother. Why be a hypocrite? Would you, for example, buy a gift for someone who treated you like shit? Nope - so same rules apply.

She would only interpret it as you crawling up her ass - so no, absolutely not!