Christmas traditions
Forums:
My wife and I have been married for almost 2 years. We have 2 girls from her previous marriage, ages 10 and 12 and 1 brand new baby boy together. She has a Christmas tradition of getting pictures with Santa with her girls. She established this tradition as a single mother. She asked me last year if I wanted to tag along and I said no thanks, I felt like I was intruding. This year with the addition of our son I'd like to be included but the girls want it to be a kids and mom thing. I feel like this is weird and I'm also being made out to seem like I'm the unusual one because it bothers me. What do you think?
10 and 12 are a bit old to be
10 and 12 are a bit old to be sitting on Santa's lap, aren't they? You should go along if your child is going - who cares what the kids want? Or mom can take them alone and you and she take the baby.
The girls are 10 and 12 .
The girls are 10 and 12 . When they are adults and have their own children, then and only then, they get to decide who comes. Mom needs to stop this 'girls get to decide' attitude now. Today it's Santa pictures, tomorrow......You get to go if you want to go.
A variety of pictures can be taken. All three kids. Two girls together. Boy alone.
Mom needs to explain to them
Mom needs to explain to them that traditions and families change over time.
Maybe try adjusting the tradition so that after the photo you all go for milkshakes or something that gets the girls excited to expand the tradition and make it extra special now you and your son are going to be participating too.
Those ages are all about
Those ages are all about groups and cliques, it looks like you are not in their clique. If they want a just mom and kids picture then fine, you should go and get just a father an son picture later.
I would talk to your wife,Nim sure she will come around. If not I would worry that she doesn't see you are a permanent fixture in the family which is very cruel and not fair to you.
Nope, make it a family pic
Nope, make it a family pic with Santa. Kids don't get to exclude their mother's husband.
Just my thoughts on the topic of course.
I have mixed feelings on this
I have mixed feelings on this. On the one hand, I don't think I'd want to change or take away a long time tradition that mom and her girls have shared. On the other, pictures with Santa seem more apropos for the little one than a 10 and 12 year old. Is it the pictures with Santa that are special, or is it special time alone with mom at the holidays that is important? Maybe it's time to make Santa pictures a whole family thing and start a more grown up event (maybe a day of shopping and a special lunch) for mom and her older girls.
Send your wife and her 2
Send your wife and her 2 girls to see Santa....don't go. Then another day you and your wife and baby boy go see Santa......assuming these 2 girls have a father they spend time with.
If they your wife has them full time...then tough sh&t....you all go see Santa and get a picure together.
I don't think there is
I don't think there is anything wrong with your wife wanting to continue a tradition of having a holiday picture of "the girls".. but that doesn't mean that you and baby can't also go and take other pictures with everyone.. or even just you and your son "the boys".