OMG - I hope I'm not the only one that does this but after an entire weekend with three screaming, fighting, whining, tattling little monsters I cannot wait for Sunday night at 6 pm. I wake up on Sunday morning saying thank God it's Sunday and then I count the hours until my BF takes his kids (girl 6, boy home to their BM! By the time they leave the house is completely destroyed, I'm mentally, physically and emotionally spent and I just want to tear my hair out. Still just knowing that my home will go back to normal is such a relief.

Ok, I am venting here, so don't take it the wrong way. I do really like the kids and they like me, but holy cow they are demanding little banshees. My son (9) is usually pretty easy to deal with, quiet, independent and doesn't cause much uproar, but when you get him with my BF's two? It's like demon seed x3!

Here's how my weekend went (feel free to share and vent about yours too, that's why I'm posting this!)

Friday: Long day at work! I got home at 5:30 dreading the little brats arrival and subsequent choas at 6. Come to find out BF didn't pick up the kids until 8 pm! That was a relief, however, BF didn't bother to call and tell me this so I had no idea when to expect the uproar, what to cook and when, or when to brace and prepare myself for the terror! So, at nearly 9 pm in walks "Damien" and "Medusa" (sorry I couldn't resist - LMAO). Now they are tired, cranky and out of sorts to boot. The first half hour isn't too bad. The kids play together nicely because they haven't seen each other in a while or been here. Then out comes the whiny pants SD to cuddle with Dada (yep, 6 years old and she still calls him Dada in a baby voice - gross right?). Of course there goes my chance of having ANY meaningful conversation or affection with/from my BF! He immediately takes his hand from mine and starts caressing her feet that are sprawled in his lap. Dude, you have two hands! So by ten at night they are wanting to eat (they eat constantly when they are here) and Dad jumps. Why the BM didn't feed them or if she did why they are hungry again, I've no idea but every time they get here on Friday night they aren't fed! You would think a snack would suffice, but oh no, BF wants to make them a full fledged dinner at ten pm!!! WTF! So I'm already starting this weekend off on a bad note. I help BF make food for the little creatins and then take my plate and eat in my bedroom because I'm ticked off, number one, and number two his daughter is sprawled on the sofa eating her food with DADA and the cartoons are blaring from each room but mine. Sorry if I'm going to eat in front of the TV at ten pm, SpongeBob or Dora (isn't 6 a bit old to still be into Dora?) is not my cup of flipping tea, especially at one million decipals! So then my son, not wanting to be outdone, says he wants to go to sleep in my bed. Well this starts WWIII with the girl who now also wants to sleep in our bed because my son does. This girl is in our bed or her father in hers every time and my son is upset saying he should get a turn. The BF gets all pissy over it because my son is trying to make things fair and his little princess (more like Queen Biatch) is crying and whining about how SHE needs to sleep in the bed. Finally I just put my son in the bed and my BF retreats to go lay down with his "little girl" in her "princess" pink bed - ugh! So we get the monsters to sleep and to my shock and amazement my BF actually doesn't end up falling asleep with his daughter and staying in her bed with her like normal. I was jubilent! Finally some adult time! So I sit next to him on the sofa watching TV and waiting. He never makes a move to touch me like he normally would (hold my hand, put his hand on my leg) and pretty much ignores me. So I get up and go to bed. My BF falls asleep watching TV on the sofa and stays there all night. I don't like to sleep alone!!! But I got lucky - ugh - my SD woke up in the middle of the night, like she does at least two or three times a night if DADA doesn't sleep with her all night, and climbed into bed with me. Not exactly what I was hoping for :O

Saturday: I wake early because I have to work. Everyone's asleep, my son in his room (I moved him to his bed once he was asleep the night before BTW) BF's son in his own bed, BF's daughter in my bed with me and BF on the sofa. I get ready for work and leave and don't wake anyone. I'm actually thankful to be going to work and hoping that some time away will put me in a better mood more able to deal with them when I get home and especially hope that maybe my BF will miss me having to care for all three kids on his own all day and be happy to see me when I return. After a long ass grueling day at work, I can't seem to go home. I drive around, go to the store, and avoid it until I can't any longer. One hour after work I walk in the door. The house is pretty much destroyed. My BF is really good about cleaning up after himself and the kids but these kids are treacherous - they completely annihilate our home and there's no way to keep up with it. All the TV's are blaring with cartoons and such and the kids are hollering and wound up - ugh! I get the obligatory hello kiss and hope that's not the end of it. We sit and talk about our day but he makes no motion to be affectionate with me at all and we barely eek out two sentences before his daughter is all over us to play with her, and be at her beck and call. Again, I retreat to my basement to do some laundry and get some peace but the girl follows me down there. BF decides to go out and pick up something for dinner and takes the girl with him. The boys are playing outside - I think, PERFECT - some peace and quiet. I turn off all the TV's and just sit for a bit. Before long they are home and dinner is on. We sit (BF and I) on the sofa for a bit and I'm hopeful. I figure, gosh maybe he's not making any move to be affectionate and sweet with me because I've been a bit reserved and annoyed so I rub his back and put my hand on his leg. Before long there's his daughter plopping in his lap so hard I'm surprised he doesn't have a darn hernia. All that goes out the window. I try again after dinner sitting next to him - nothing. Now I'm getting really upset. If he were like this all the time I wouldn't get upset but normally he is very affectionate. When his kids are around though he acts like I don't exist! I'm not saying I want him to hang on me or take me on the sofa or anything but a tiny bit would go a LONG way for me. I never expect sex when his kids are here. Out of the question. He usually has to sleep with his daughter and if he doesn't she wakes up all night anyway. So I say something to the effect of 'wow' and walk away. He asks me what's wrong and I say 'nothing' not wanting to start anything with the kids here. So finally it's time to put them to bed. My son has already passed out at 9:30 but he let's his hellions stay up as late as they want running around hollering and such. He finally puts them to bed at 10:30. He tried to put them down at ten but they were watching a program so he let them stay up. Now here's what gets me...these kids are going to be tired and cranky little sh*theads the next day...BF hates it when they fight and such yet he sets it up to happen by not letting them get proper rest! So I sit and wait...an hour goes by and he's still in bed with his daughter - ugh. This time I decide to go in and see what's the plan so I ask him, 'are you sleeping in here tonight?' and he actually says no and gets up. Once again I'm cautiously optimistic but I know one of two things could happen: either Medusa will wake up and call him back into her bed within ten minutes or (b) he will say he's so tired and has to go to bed. Well I got lucky option b. He got up for ten minutes, had a drink, again, didn't touch me and barely spoke to me, and off to bed he went. I can't tell you how much I wanted to go to bed with him and cuddle and at least feel some connection to him but I couldn't bring myself to do it because I was to upset. So on this night it was my turn to fall asleep on the sofa and that's what I did. I woke up at 4 in the morning and climbed into bed but he had his back turned to me so it was basically again like I slept alone.

Sunday: I woke to hear my BF's son screaming wildy just being an all out demon seed. You see he takes medicine for severe ADHD but my BF refuses to give it to him on the weekends resulting in a kid that is so wound up and like the tasmanian devil! Good news is that BF's daughter is still asleep. Yes, I think, a few mintues with my BF alone. The boys are awake and playing together anyway. I sit next to him on the sofa once again practically begging for a morsel of affection but not showing it. Nothing, nada, zip, zilch. He keeps both hands on his coffee cup with what appears to be a death grip. Within minutes the "princess" is awake. She's never very happy and usually cranky when she wakes up (like a two year old) so she sleepily shuffles over to DADA (I hate that, man) and flops in his lap again and the love fest is on! He's all snuggled up with her and she's all pressed against his chest and they act as though they haven't seen each otherin years. Then when she wakes a bit she looks into his eyes lovingly and says Dada and he says her name, then she says Dada and he says her name. This putrid display of babyism and puppylove goes on for what seems like forever and I want to puke. I feel extremely uncomfortable even being in the same room so I leave! Then we have to be short order cooks - each kid wants something different and they all want it at different times so we spend the entire flipping day cooking, getting drinks, doing dishes and being slaves to these over priveledged entitled coddled monsters! The whole time, the entire weekend, I do most of this with a smile on my face and I try my hardset to be sweet with the kids and not say much, but inside I'm spitting nails sometimes! One glimmer of hope comes into play when my BF finally comes in to help me fix our bed. The kids jumped on it and broke it the night before - animals! Even this simple task of doing something together makes me feel a tiny bit connected with him because it's the most he has spoken to me or paid attention to me all darn weekend! The daughter is in the bath tub so she's not up our arses and the boys are playing. At this point I'm hopeful that I can get off my bitch fit and try to be sweet with him and him with me. Hey a girl can hope, right? That doesn't last long because the tired and cranky kids (his mainly, my kid got a decent night's sleep) start instigating each other and fighting. As usual its the boys against the girl and she instigates them until they react and then she comes screaming, whining and crying to us about it. I don't give her what she wants which is for the adult to yell at the boys and then hug and coddle her like a baby because this only makes things worse! My BF on the other hand, gives into it every time! The boys are playing with HER princess ball and she wants it back so she comes in and says, "he won't give me my ball" in this long ass whine and my BF jumps up and takes the ball away from the boys and storms outside with his little princess to play with the ball. Then she comes out to me and says one of the boys is blaming her for farting and she didn't - are you kidding me? You can't make this stuff up, honestly! She's whining about it and practically in tears because I won't go yell at the boys and baby her. Then my son really sets her off - he tells her she can't go in their fort because it's too dangerous and he's afraid she will get hurt. Of course she comes running to tattle, 'he won't let me in the fort' again in a whine that is like nails on a damn chalkboard to me. I know my BF is waiting for me to yell at or reprimand my son but at this point I refuse. I finally tell him, 'Baby I know you are looking out for her and thinking about safety but it's up to her Dad whether he thinks its safe for her to go int he fort and if he does she can.' Apparently BF doesn't like this answer or the way I handle it so he storms off again outside without saying a word. Then the silent treatment begins..I'm pissed at him, he's pissed at me and we walk around the house avoiding each other and not speaking, basically. There's no real anger being shown the kids haven't a clue and we smile as we walk by one another and ask questions when needed, 'where does this go, who does this belong to' so on and so forth but underneath we both want to scream. Finally the magic hour draws near..he decides since my son is going out for dinner with his dad that he will just stop when he takes his kids home and get them something to eat. Thank God because I really didn't want to feed the picky little creeps. Every time I do the girls whines in a long drawl, "I don't like that." and I just want to smack the whine right out of her (please know I'm exaggerating - I have never and would never hit a kid in my life ever). So usually he takes the kids home at 5:30 and I'm just waiting not patiently mind you for him to go yet he doesn't. He hangs out here letting the kids trash the place until 6:30! It's like I just get done cleaning one room and the little brats have already destroyed another one and move on to the one I JUST cleaned. I get fed up and tell them they are not allowed in our room or on our bed. They already broke it once and destroyed our room once - no more. Again all three TV's are on and blaring yet no one is in front of them. My BF and I are doing nothing but cleaning and not speaking. You could cut the tension between us with a knife! I know at this point my BF doesn't want to clean because he was watching golf yet when he sees me picking up after his kids he feels guilty and helps, but I can tell he doesn't like it. So when he finally said he was leaving I was nearly jumping for joy. Then he says he won't be back until late because he's not bringing the brats home until 8 pm! There goes any shot at us having some time this evening! Anyway I'm just glad they are leaving. I literally pour a glass of wine as they are pulling out the driveway, flop on my sofa and take in the peace and quiet. The BF shows up home at 9:30 and suddently he's back to being the man I love and adore. He's holding my hand, talking with me like nothing happened. Meantime I'm sitting there saying WTF? I realize at the end of the evening that my BF is more than worth putting up with those monsters. I realize that I do love this man with all my heart and I do really like his kids. I figure if he can be this attentive, sweet and caring when they aren't here that maybe I can deal with the distance when his kids are here and my heart softens and I have no choice but to adore him and drink in the attention that I feel I had been starving for all weekend. I hope and pray that the next kid weekend will be better but in the back of my mind I'm already wondering...will he surprise me and bring them here mid week for a visit (Oh, God, I hope not)! So I've spent most of my Monday recouperating from the weekend and I'm already in the tinest bit dreading the next kid weekend. I feel like a cow for saying all this and feeling all this because I know he's a good dad loves his kids and wants to see them more and I kow that I have to accept his kids to love and be with him.