Finally after too many years (four+) of agonizing over what I was doing "wrong" I have booted DH out of the house (six months ago) and filed and successfully divorced him with my prenupt intact. He put his obsession over his children over me and had me, the sucker, paying for all of his expenses while he siphoned everything he earned toward his kids' college tuition and support and gas money -- anything so he looked like a hero. I finally got a great counselor and have moved beyond the what-am-I-doing-wrong phase to what a colossal asshole this man is and how dare he ask me to marry him so I could pay for him and vicariously for his kids. He has borrowed a great deal of money that he hasn't paid back and taken advantage of me for four years and finally I am free of him and his lousy guilt trip about how he "needs" a place to see his kids so he can parent. His kids are 22, 20 and 19. LOL. Maybe pay for yourself and don't sponge off of me might be a start.

Do I sound bitter? Yes...but I also am so incredibly happy to be free of all the bullshit and baggage and fake guilt trips! His kids are his responsibility. Why ask someone to marry you when you can't even support yourself, let alone your Teflon brats? Yeah! It will take me a little while longer to unravel all my resentment and anger, but I did it! I really did it! And he did nothing but try to make me feel guilty because I wanted to -- gasp! -- spend time alone with the man I had just recently married. I must have been defective because I didn't want to spend every stinking weekend and every free moment around his "children" -- who were all over 18!

Joke is the asshole is now living in his friend's office (homeless!) and drives around a broken down shit box car that he can't afford to fix. Yet he was such an asshole that he couldn't treat me with the respect that I deserved so now he is entitled to nothing. At least no one can use me any more.