I know this sounds really horrible and just need some sort of advice. I have been with my partner since 2006 and we have 2 beautiful children together both under the age of 2. My partner has a 8 year old son from a previous relationship who he has every other weekend and split holidays. I just cant seem to show any love for my stepson who is age 8. His BM and my partner were married and divorced by the time my SS was even 2. I havent spoken to my SS BM for few months and i have no issue with her at all we totally different people, BM love materalistic things and must have the top of the range things and i dont im more down to eartH. Anyways i dont feel like a SM to him. I try my hardest to treat him as one of my own but its impossible he just dont listen to what i say. One weekend in example we visited my partners dad for the very first time the other weekend (he never met his real dad until after 30 years so it was a really big thing) as soon as we got there. My SS decided to start kicking his football in their house, Im a respectful person and appreciate other peoples house as i certainly wouldnt like a football being kicked in my house, anyways i said to him please can you put that football away we in a house something is more than likely to get smashed he totally ignored me, not only that our eldest saw my SS do this so she thought it was fun and wanted to join in who is 2. My SS totally ignored me i was embarrassed. The second night we was there each child got a present from the family My SS got some lego. he was sitting on the table doing his lego but getting really frustrated with it probably also due to the long 9 hour drive the day before and it being 9 oclock at night, as he got frustrated with it he picked it up and smashed it against my partners family glass coffee table and started lying on the floor crying. I was mortified as i thought i hope they dont think this is how we bring our children up. My partner was fuming and could say anything as he has only met his dad on this 3rd occassion but told my SS to say sorry for tht behaviour and why dont you go up to bed for an early night as youre tired but once again ignored I really dont feel like an adult i never let my children behave this way. It got worse my SS decided to bring 100 pound with him Bearing in mind we were only away for 3 days and he neednt any money plus he was 8, Me and my partner told him to keep the money in his pocket and leave it there and not to take the money out as you could lose it, anyways he ignored both of our pleas to put his money away and chose every opportunity he met someone new to get his money out, this embarrassed us as we not well off and only manage to keep our heads above water, also my partners dad took us all out for meal that day and we all have manners even my 2 year old said thank you all my SS could say im not eating this, it has maggots in, all this is in 2 days i have never been so embarrassed in my life. On our journey home we stop off for lunch as it was a 9hour drive, we stopped off at burger king and asked my SS does he want anything he said no so we left it as that due to our 2 year old sleeping and our infant child sleeping, we could give our SS some lunch when the kids wake up. We decided to stop at a restaurant and the lady kindly let my daugther eat the salad packed for her at the table. I gave my daughter her salad and my SS his, He turned round and said Dad I dont want this i want something else and decided to look at the menu. Cause my whole weekend was ruined and in a foul mood and sick of my SS getting his own way I said No you can eat your salad there is nothing wrong it and you had a chance to have a burger king earlier but you said no you either have this or nothing at all. He started crying cause he couldnt get his own way. My partner tried talking to BM but the answer he got was well not my fault we like to buy our son things and laughed about the money situation (like explained a materialistic person) my partners dad even gave our SS a television in perfect good condition BM wouldnt accept it as it wasnt a flat screen and told my partner to take it back and SS agreed by saying i want a flat screen for my bedroom i just thought how ungrateful can you both get. I was just so angry I have tried to treat him as one of my own but everytime i try and have a conversation i get answers like yes no and that is the end of the conversation without eye contact, im at my wits end, he ignores anything i say, dont want to communicate with me, and acts like a spoil little brat, wanting a new toy every 5 mins smashing them up if not going to plan and starts crying. I love my partner to bits and have spoken to him on many occassions and he agrees with me but nothing is changing even with my 2 year old he takes her toys and plays with them so she start crying cause she wants her toy he calls her such a cry baby which infuriates me as she happy to share but he doesnt all without my partners presence. It has got to the stage where i have moved out with the 2 children and still with my partner, he lives in his appartment and has he son there every other weekend i tend not to see them on those weekends anymore. I Love my partner to bits but just not sure how to react on things anymore, a bit of advice is well and truly needed.