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update ideas on how we can outwit bm and skids who try and ruin our relationships

the mum's picture

women to update ideas for out witting weak husbands who are manipulated and bm who think they can beat us, and force us to leave our relationships. Plus skids that are trying the same. Start updating what has worked and what you tried so we can learn from each other.

So bookmark me and stay posted. Let the games begins!

Idea 1:-

Start to try and predict what bm will do. Make arrangements for the dates you should have free with dh. Like going to your family, doing something with your child, going for a meal or movies and book tickets. Don't tell him till you have booked and say its a special time with him (it will help your relationship and you will have fun anyway and skids and bm don't want this).

Don't mention his kid so he don't realise what your doing. That way you then put him in trouble if he breaks it. Bm will lose power, she is playing a game and loving it. Now its time for the table to turn

StepMadre's picture

It's a cliche but living well really is the best revenge, especially when it comes to BMs. I believe that most of their crazy, violent, verbally abusive, bitchy and jealous behavior comes out of pure insecurity, jealousy and immaturity. The reason they are such bitches (and I am generalizing here a bit) is because the are most often competing with a woman who their ex's are in love with and often the woman is nicer, younger and prettier than the BM (there are lots of reasons why men leave the BMs and those are definitely aspects). It has to be agonizing to a scorned/dumped/rejected woman to see their ex's (who most of them are obviously still hung up on) happily with or married to women that clearly makes them happy. They are wicked jealous and insecure and so it leads to all kinds of sad and inappropriate behavior.
I think there are other reasons, but insecurity, bitterness and jealousy top the list for reasons BMs often try so hard to sabotage our marriages/relationships and they try parental alienation and use their kids as pawns because they are so immature and care more about themselves than their kids happiness and well being. They hate it when their kids love their SMs/SD's because they view it as a threat to them and so they try to turn the skids against one or both of the other parents and it also often has a lot to do with revenge and bitterness and BMs see using parental alienation as another way to "get back" at their ex's and their new wives.
That's my take on it anyway!

Madam Hedgehog's picture

Well, everytime we go out of town BM will call about three hours later with some medical emergency concerning the boys (which magically clear up by the time we return from another ruined vacation).

So, we started telling her we were going to leave the day before we left, or the evening before, or morning rather than afternoon. lol. It gives her time to play her nonsense games, and then look like an idiot when we show up fifteen minutes later to see the sick kid (who is 100% happy and running around the house like a tornado). Then we go on our vacation and she feels too stupid to do it again until a few weeks later.

Lola Leigh's picture

let their own tricks backfire... like when my skids BM suddenly decided to move back to her home country of Germany and took the kids while we were on our honeymoon. She thought DH would follow right behind, he didn't. So now we will at the most see them once a year and I get to live without the hassle of dealing with 2 homes and the back and forth of skids, the good life, or at least as good as it gets with blended families Biggrin