I'm hoping for advice on dealing with the Christmas holiday period as it approaches.

Brief history, SD is 22 and I am the only father she has known. BioDad left as soon as he found out my wife was pregnant and has never been on the scene. We have 2 other sons with special needs. SD has had every privilege i could offer and has been treated as my own. Over the last 3 years she had lived at home rent free while doing a degree at University and in the last year she got with a new GF and spent the year lying about her GF which caused a lot of issues within the family. I no longer feel like SD and I have any real bond. I'm not sure if this is a permanent split but for the sake of my two sons I have disengaged to prevent my wife and I divorcing.

SD is 22 and now lives with her GF. BioMum refuses to see the wrongs done by SD and prefers to blame me. She has accepted that SD and I don't spend any time together now and we are working on the marriage.

My problem lies in Christmas. If SD comes round it will make Christmas uncomfortable and horrible and I simply do not want her here. She doesn't speak with respect to or about me so and I don't want to deal with that in my own home at Christmas, let alone any other time of year.

BioMum and I have just started back on working on our relationship and I'm worried this will set us back but I know I won't be able to fake it over Christmas either so the lesser of two evils is asking her to go to her daughters place to spend time with her at Christmas.

Anyone had experience of asking BioParents to split their time at Christmas between them and StepKids? Any idea on broaching the issue will be greatly appreciated.