sorry everyone that this is a saga....I actually printed out part 1..I think this is more a therapy for me just getting the story out.........so sorry any of you still reading.....

anyhow cut to the chase....I changed....before I met him i worked in high stress, take no shit, job has to be done jobs....37 single travelled the world, been there done that bought the tshirt.....I am a nice, lovely girl who hasnt had much problem getting on with people...but dont cross me, i'll tear your head off......that side emerged....you want to hang around with the adults..too bad...kids shouldnt be allowed to be smart arses to adults...find friends....your not hanging around the house watching tv all day, visit a friend...you dont like eating spaghetti because you think it is worms going down your throat...your 12 not 4....eat it....dont dare steal from us!!!! learn your manners, you dont want to do anything at school...too bad your going to do your homework....you want to live on lollies and sneakily buy them and hide them...your not...you can one or two a week your not going to live on them....i want time with my friends alone..you arent going to sit with us and think it is your right to listen to everything we say...you get the idea...the kid gloves went off.....the result a kid who started doing well at school, went to doctors reguarly to be monitored for deterioration, who had friends and actually liked her peers, a kid who eats extremely healthily, who has a part time job to earn money and gets pocket money, doesnt give cheek, and does anything you ask her around the house (always has been a good little worker)...an angel right, the perfect teenage girl.....so so very close.....we have great days where she is my best friend and I truly truly like her......BUT.....there is a side that is hidden, the real her that I think she hides because she is scared of me and she also knows this other side is the right way to be so that is what she presents to the world.

the stealing hasnt stopped, it is just more cunningly done, she chooses the easy way to do things in life to get what she wants or where she needs to be.....a couple of examples...she has saved stacks and stacks of money but hates spending it but seems to get a kick out of what other people can give her and what she can give them...she has asked a boy she knew liked her for credit for her phone when she had money, she has taken money out of kids school bags, she has turned up with that many items she found....I have spoken to other kids and money has gone missing from neighbours while she was there, another kids purse when missing while lani was around...this hasnt been proven she took it...but you can bet your left leg.....it is just the suspicion that is bad enough,.....

One day I looked thru her school books and there were days she wasnt doing any work...she has conned kids into doing essays etc for her, cheated.....
the lying is pathological....it is story after story the thing is she is such an angel at other things and puts on such a good act....this is now splitting my personal family who are not related to her and I feel as if I am going nuts.......she is so so hard to work out......I dont know how many times she has stolen or lied...

everytime she is caught out it causes so so much trouble....i nag her father, he doesnt know what to do with her as he is all she really has, they do not have a close relationship at all...honestly if you met this kid you would think she was an angel.....I have not trusted her for a very very very long time and think her acting is academy award winning.....her dark side is so well hidden that only those who look see it....unfortunately I now think I am obsessed with looking and she knows I know...I am very close to my personal family and they get involved....the act comes out and it is like she plays us (MY FAMILY FOR GOD SAKE NO RELATIONS)
of against each other and gets a kick out it....

Then granny from down south gets involved on the phone and you can see the act come on again...and it is like "I dont know why...I'm so naughty" in a little sweet voice and nanny just goes...you naughty little girl stop it....

I feel like she is emily strange really....hiding with a voodoo doll....standing back watching it all unfold and then coming out of her room and being pollyanna....it is now got to the stage that i see the acting and it is a growl inside of me.....nothing phases her...she is like a cold fish...you can yell, scream, be nasty, threaten with foster homes and she just looks at you and flutters her eyelids....I have asked her if she feels guilt or if nothing phases her and she has said no......it is like I am Allana...I want, I take I dont care.......

you have to remember that there is no other party to take her....I am a stay at home mum, my husband works every third weekend...I am responsible for buying this kid her cholestorol free food, taking her to the doctors, getting her around and since she doesnt want to still really do anything with other kids, spending time with her.....

she has everything....tv, dvd, ipod phone....a room her friends are envious of....she gets pocket money, we never say no you cant to the movies etc....(actually push her as this is the only way I get a break from her)........her mothers family dont give her a thing and my husbands family live down south and come up once or twice a year..they are beautiful people....but MY family live in the same town, are quite wealthy, extremely generous......so when it is her birthday it is MY family that load her full of presents, make her the cake have the party for her, we go and visit MY family and they make sure she doesnt miss out on the chocolates and the gifts my mother who spoils our kids rotten has....her photo is up everywhere in my home and my mothers.....but it is like they are sources of gifts to her...not people....I feel she uses them and I HATE THAT......

Her father has said that she is her mother all over and that is why I am scared stiff...her mother did not care that she wrecked every mans life that she went into...took their children because of her selfish needs without thinking about the children or the men....ended up with any man as long as they were paying her and her kids way and then left when a better man option came along...you heard about the burning down the house, she had $100000 when she died and no one knows where she got it from...I worked at the telephone company and i found that she got out of paying her bills by changing her name of date or birth all of the time. One of the exes says he couldnt take her out to the pub because she would be sneakily giving other guys the eye...regardless of whether their wives were with them or not....she just didnt care....now see why I am scared....is this like mother like daughter.....

Now re the sickness....about a year ago we were told that there was a drug that would not cure this sickness but in most cases it would hold them at what stage of deterioration they were at...the catch $300 000 a year...please beleive me this is true......shit I cried...to get that type of money each year would mean selling your home, someone ...yep i bet it would have be me and MY family......would have to constantly door knock politicians, charities, fund raise etc...

For those who dont like their step kids and have them every 2nd weekend...imagine the torture in your mind knowing you would have to sell your house, sacrifice any holidays, private schools, sports, just time with your biological kids because of some fat sluts brat that you cant stand...but your conscience knows you have to save a life...that is torture.....

why I have come looking for help is yesterday we had the worse and the best day .....she hasnt stolen for about 5 months....remember this kid has no other party to go to so I cant trust her in my own home and if I dont leave her at home I have to cart the kid around with me....hubby and I get no time alone.....so anyhow...we had a have to trust you lani...started leaving her at home...things have been really good for a couple of months....pollyanna.....she told me she was going shopping with friends...and I admit, I wanted her to do something to get her out of the house......the last thing I said to her was "remember lani we are trusting you....keep it decent"....

I had a phone call while she was gone....her doctor had been to the drug company, had flown them to canberra, this had taken months and between them and the government, the drug company and the honest working tax payers of australia are going to be paying $300000 a year to keep this kid alive.....I cried I thanked him, I blessed him....

she came home...all she uttered was a sentence and my world collapsed...I was hyperventaling...she had bourjois nail polish and told me she had got it from a grocery store...I straight away knew she was lying...she had had a spree.....the lies..it went on and on...story after story...she wasnt even with the other kids...I rang them....I rang the husband and said get this kid out of my life.....(she also had a wad of her own money on her...) he felt the same....she just didnt care...after everything we've been thru...I told her about the doctor and the hoops this man has jumped and it was like.."oh yeah..great".....cold fish....my family got involved....my father thinks that sweet little lani might be a bit simple that is why she steals, my mother hates her and has seen right thru her and has said watch this kid, she is trouble....her father thinks she is trouble like her mother, my sister thinks we are all disguisting for thinking this way of poor sick lani.....my mother and sister are each others throats....i dont talk to my father...her father hasnt stopped crying..her mothers family are all having a say but none of them actually want to take her on because they know the trouble her mother caused........and the cold fish just sits back and watches it all take place without any remorse or guilt......but has put on the poor little me act.....oh hasnt said sorry tho.....

Please help me...I want to disengage and disengage fast.....she is 16 almost 17 and finishes school at the end of this year....I want to do the right thing and get her out of school and onto this drug and then out of my life.......the trouble is because of her condition she wont get a licence to drive and the drug is going to be administered here in my town....my family is the only family up here.....what do I do...I know the stealing and using of people and conning people is going to keep happening....I dont want to know about it...

PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME......I WANT TO DO THE RIGHT THING SO MY CONSCIENCE IS CLEAR WITHOUT HAVING MY CHILDRENS FUTURE AFFECTED

Also