You are here

OT - Differences of Opinion

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 12:56pm

I did not want to regurge all over the lovely Gimlet's Weekly PA & SM blog and felt this deserved its own space because I do not find this to be a petty annoyance. 

It annoys me when someone cannot respect that we have differing opinions and they proceed to argue with me about why *I* am wrong. Horsepuckey! There is no right and there is no wrong. This is, quite simply, a matter of preferences. FTR, they are arguing; I merely state my likes and dislikes and reiterate that we will have to agree to disagree. But, no. Raise your voice, act like an arse, and tell me again why I am supposed to hate what I love. At 56yo, I'm pretty sure I'm old enough to know what I like and dislike. Sheesh.

 

I have two family members who hate where I live. Okay, that's not true. They LOATHE it and have been quite verbal about that. Their choice. And neither of them live here any more. They live in Florida. Good for them.

What's annoying to me is twofold. 1) They refuse to accept that I find this area beautiful and want to live here for the rest of my days, and 2) constantly ARGUE about why I am 'wrong' for disliking Florida and loving da Yoop!

I say again: Horsepuckey! 

  • You hate snow. I love it!
  • You hate the slower pace. I love it!
  • You hate the lack of big name stores and shopping. I love it!
  • You want swimming pools and the ocean. I want swimming holes and Lake Superior.
  • You love crowds of people. I'm cringing at the thought.
  • You love city life. I am mentally sprinting for the woods at the mere thought of "city".
  • You love heat and one season all year long. I want to weep at the thought of missing the seasons.
  • You want busy roads, a busy life, and lots of people because you get bored. I want empty roads, peace & quiet, and places where I won't see anyone for hours/day because I'm content.
  • You tell me I only love the Yoop because I've never lived in Florida. I have visited Florida enough times to know that, not only do I not want to live there, I have no desire to visit again.

 

I couldn't care less that you don't understand my love of this area. It means absolutely nothing to me that you fail/refuse to see the beauty. But I DO care about the fact that you're constantly harping on me about why I should hate it here. WTF. Just because you do??? Pfffffft. Even after making those (IMO) very valid points - that you and I are opposites and that you are where you should be and I'm where I should be - you are like a dog with a bone. I take that back: you are much, much WORSE than that dog. 

This is not just about my location preference, but all-too-often about other things I like that these people dislike (or vice versa). And what do I do when people refuse to respect my opinion/choice? I avoid them. When I have to be around them, I go Grey Rock. And what do YOU do, you dog with a bone? Ask why I don't talk to you about personal things. ~eye roll~

Please feel free to comment about any differences of opinion that you find annoying. However... This blog is NOT the place for politics or religion, so please do not bring those hot topics into this blog. Those comments will be deleted.

Comments

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 12:59pm

I have a hard time with people who like to argue for the sake of arguing. It is toxic and draining to me.

I love Lake Supieror. I kayaked its boundary waters and the apostle island chain. I also love where I live and Ive lived in a big city.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:20pm

CLove, I hear that! I am willing to discuss any manner of things with most people. Unfortunately, too many are not able to discuss. They argue, they dictate, they act ugly. I've done a helluva job cutting toxic out of my life, including family. I'm trying to spend quality time with my Dad while he's up here and certainly don't need the naysayers taking away from that.

Lucky you! I'm a novice kayaker and have never kayaked the Lake. Plenty of smaller ones! But we would need different kayaks to negotiate those waters. *kiss2*

Merry's picture

Submitted by Merry on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:10pm

It seems to me that some people can't see the beauty in people's differences. From small things to big things. The thought of one, big homogenous, Borg-like existence makes my skin crawl, but others scream YOU SHOULD BE LIKE ME AND THINK LIKE ME and then we'd all get along. Blech.

I'm all for getting along, but it goes more like this: I liked a movie but you didn't? Great. Let's talk about it and we'll both learn something. I prefer unoaked and you prefer the oaked Chardonnay? Great. Let's have a taste test and we'll end up having a good time. You're a Yooper and I'm not? Great. Let's tell stories about the places we love and hate and see what we have in common, and maybe we'll embark on a new adventure.

 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:30pm

So true, Merry! And definitely Borg-like. I even made the comment that if everyone lovef Florida, it would be too crowded to walk normally. Response? "It's already crowded." Well then, Karma should serve you up a little dose of too crowded for a week or two. Horrid traffic jams, 3-hour wait for a restaurant, lines for gas, long lines in the grocery store, backorders on stock, no space between towels at the beach (and you had to park 5 miles away)....

You are spot on. A new adventure! *drinks*

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:20pm

Yeah, entitled COD's dont need to do chores, because it might scar them for life...

Thumper's picture

Submitted by Thumper on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:29pm

You tell 'em Aniki

Smile

No reason for those two to be so ugly about it.  I am sorry.

 

Watereddown's picture

Submitted by Watereddown on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:33pm

We had dinner with DH's parents last weekend. DH and I don't like shrimp. At all. MIL got angry with all of us, FIL too, because we wouldn't eat her last damn shrimp. *shok*

shellpell's picture

Submitted by shellpell on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:50pm

Tell me about it. One of my siblings thinks I'm nuts for not having a TV in the living room and on all the time like they have. Sorry, I prefer a quiet living room and have a TV in the basement. But no, I'm wrong. This is just one of many differences of opinion we have. I also hate hot weather, but I'm supposed to suffer through it because the rest of my immediate family loves it. No thanks.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:56pm

Sister! Same here: I hate hot weather and suffered from heat stroke, but am supposed to suffer though it and want to move to/live in bloody hot Florida. NO.

Psssst... the only time our tv is on is the weekends. Otherwise, it's off for days!

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 2:54pm

OMG, heat stroke! ARG! If you've never had it, you'll never understand how awful it can be. The older I get, the faster it hits me. I have an outdoor wedding to attend at the beginning of August and am sick worrying about how to survive it. 

Aniki, you have my full sympathy, I still see the seasons but I miss the myriad of shades of green.. 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 3:09pm

Thank you, Winterglow. Heatstroke is the pits! My DH did not really understand until we were hiking one day. I drank 5-6 times the amount of water he did to stay hydrated and was still parched. We stopped at the gas station and I bought and drank 2 1-liter bottles of water and drank both before we got home. It was almost 4 hours before I had to tinkle. Had this been a day at home, I would have gone every hour or so. *wacko*

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 3:46pm

I get vertigo, nausea and the runs... and the wedding will be in a place with ONE toilet for 150 guests. 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 5:13pm

Nooooooooo!!! I suppose taking immodium beforehand is a bad idea.  Sad

bearcub25's picture

Submitted by bearcub25 on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 1:58pm

I need a beach fix every few years, and god awful heat and humidity, but I'm ready for the Appalachians and trees to block the sun after a few days of seeing nothing but buildings and sky on the horizon.

I am sick of the snow and bitter cold but damn it makes the Spring so much sweeter!

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 2:08pm

And if you lived in at the beach/city, bearcub25, youwould not experience the sweetness of Spring arriving. You get it!

caninelover's picture

Submitted by caninelover on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 2:26pm

I can't stand Florida and unfortunately I need to go there in 2 weeks with SO.  Florida in the dead of summer is my idea of hell.

ndc's picture

Submitted by ndc on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 2:33pm

I could be a Yooper in the summertime and for a couple weekends of ice fishing, and a Floridian for most of the winter, if only someone would like to finance multiple homes and back and forth travel for me.  I totally get why some people love one place and others another.  I personally don't care for cities, but I can recognize their appeal for others. It's a pretty close minded person who can't comprehend that not everyone shares their personal  likes and dislikes. I do have trouble understanding why anyone would like a flying cockroach, though.  I hate arguing in general, and I especially hate arguing with the overly opinionated.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 2:48pm

 It's a pretty close minded person who can't comprehend that not everyone shares their personal  likes and dislikes. 

And that, my dear ndc, is spot on! *drinks*

ExhaustedByItAll's picture

Submitted by ExhaustedByItAll on Mon, 07/12/2021 - 6:08pm

Has to point out how my opinions on things are wrong and will argue endlessly. Fighting for the sake of fighting on everything from my fashion choices (or lack thereof in her opinion), my hair, my job, how we are raising Toddler, the state of my living room, where we live...sigh. She always begins with a loaded question, "Why don't you move somewhere less expensive?" Followed by her POV, "Now that you're working from home, you can live anywhere." This is her stance, there is no changing her view/opinion and anything you say that is no wholeheartedly agreeing and then acting on it is wrong.

We are half a world away, and the "end meeting for all" button on zoom has been hit more than once when I won't argue back with her. My go to response has become, "You seem to feel very strongly about that." I don't agree or disagree with her and won't engage so she hangs up on me and then goes and yells at my dad!