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update: we fixed the sink lol

Chmmy's picture

I found out why BM couldn't pick up YSD15 at practice. She had told DH that she 'had to get ready for her day.' I guess she had to make her lunch for work the following day. Not sure what kind of lunch she makes, but I or my husband make lunches almost daily for her 2 kids still in high school, and often dinner too. We manage most days, but like I said, I wanted a one time favor from her. 

We fixed the sink BTW. It took 2 nights because DH had to go to Menards to get a tooI. We asked her for the favor on the 2nd night.

Anyway making lunch and laying out her clothes etc must have been too much for her because when OSD24 called her the next day, she had not gone to work and her supposedly soon to be ex was at her apartment. OSD mentioned this to DH on our car ride to the Blackhawks game that the 4 SKs treated my husband and I to go to for his birthday. DH just put his hand on my leg so I didn't jump out the car window!!!! I literally had a meltdown over the "I had to make my lunch," AND THEN SHE DIDN'T GO TO WORK. I had a meltdown from being up til midnight two nights in a row and not sleeping well(also up til midnight the following night but the Blackhawks game was worth it lol.) I know life happens and that's ok but it hurts my husband that HE DOES EVERYTHING with me as his support and they run to BM (except OSD24). When I got upset, DH said, well she will rot in hell for her sins. He also told me the next day he's not going to fret over things he cant change...he's a better person that me there, cuz I'd rather fret and cry and plot my revenge. Yes, I know, I need to stop but I've been emotional for 2 days over this. I lost it and cried. I cried for the kids who chase their mother's love instead of accepting the love coming from the other women in their life. I cried for my husband who is exhausted and spent and spreads himself too thin. I cried for myself as I will never be enough.

Comments

Harry's picture

They don't care about you.   Disengage... let DH make there lunches. Or they can go to BM for there lunches.  I will / will not fo anything for them until they respect you.  This talk about BM  uying her wedding dress is disrespectful.  They are adults, they can go live with BM. 

Chmmy's picture

HA...that was my idea, that BM can make their lunch a couple days a week.Then they can come home and say how they had 'mom's sandwich' for lunch. 

I did disengage but it's hard to live with kids and be completely disengaged. I have had it out with the kids many times, even moved out for a summer. DH dealt with his kids and I came back. I dont play mommy, nor do I parent the kids but I still get upset that BM is such an asshole. Even if they are being fake, they are kind and respectful, at least to my face. We're not the Brady Bunch but we live together like a family. We've all made mistakes and we have worked things out. Years ago, I would have been excluded from the family hockey game. When they bought the tix they got them for both DH and I without DH's knowledge, so even if it is fake, they know that I am his wife and if they exclude me, he wont be there either.

Wow Harry, what happened to you that on every post you are so angry and anti-step life. I'll admit, I was the same but my option was to leave my home and my husband. His choices were to continue to be a shit parent with his head up his ass or lose his wife. We managed to work things out, although step life is still tough

Rags's picture

Hunger, thirst, being hot, being cold all tend to bring clarity to the behaviors of noxious Step Spawn. All tied directly to them behaving respectfully.  Behave respectfully, avoid hunger, thirst, heat, and cold. Don't behave respecfully. Call you dad, call your mom.