ever want to lay down and let a truck roll over you?
It's late and I finally have some time to myself to try and get these toxins out of my mind so I can sleep.
Oldest Sd (17) flew out today. She had to go home (from her visit with daddy) early for colorguard camp.
This is the 3rd year I've seen the departures. They aren't pretty. Tears and pictures of tears. This is the firs time however I've seen the whole scenario. It's all always the same..the tears start the day before. And get progressivly more dramatic. The problem: she doesn't want to go home because she's going to get yelled at for not saving all her birthday money. She has a payment due for a band trip later this month. This was known going into this visit. I offered her extra chores for money...rolled her eyes at me and stretched out on the couch. This year it's a band trip, last year it was car insurance. The year before ect.,,,,see the pattern.
So what do you suppose happened???
Come on you can figure it out!~~~YEP. Daddy forked over the money! I told him at this rate we'd be paying her bills when she's 30 if someone doesn't teach her to work for what you need.
NOW, HERE'S THE KICKER!!! Hubbster wasn't home from the airport 5 minutes when he tells my bioson 14 to get out and get the yard mowed. Son was going to a surprise birthday party within the next couple of hours and was already ready. Son protested mildy. Hubby comes back with "well you want spending money for camp don't you?" (Son is leaving for band camp tomorrow). I hit the roof. Hubby says "well you don't want him going without money". I question what would it hurt to 'front' him the money.
Son goes out and mows in the hottest part of the afternoon while sd14 is on the computer. Thing about it is....he'll send her home with a fist full of dollars at the end of the month.
I spouted off that bioson will mow the yard and learn to earn his own way. Cause it's easier to teach it now than after they've developed the art of reaching for the guilt money.
Sorry if this read like a drunk person wrote it but I'm so tired and want to sleep so badly! Especially since my alarm is set for 4 hrs from now!
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Infuriating!
I understand how infuriating it is for you. I went through similiar things with my family. Most of the time it wouldn't be money involved but there were a few times. I never could understand why the stepkids could get by with "murder" and our bio-son couldn't get by with the smallest thing. My hubby always gave the excuse that I only get to see them every other weekend when the BIOMOM allows it and I don't want them "mad" at me. But it's okay for the bio-son to be mad? Infuriating, yes! Does it ever end? Sorry to say in my case it never has! Keep your chin up though, you can't get yourself so tired, etc.
Different Standards of Parenting...I hate it too
It seems my kids (13 & 11ish) ..his SK's are held to a higher standard..then his much older kids (21 & 30). He has no problem telling my kids to put thier dishes away...and they should!! But it was always an argument when told him to make the 18/19 yr old put her dishes away!!! I don't get it either...he's "normal" when it comes to how to be a parent with anyone elses kids. His concept of actions & consequences & what's appropriate & what's not seems to disappear when it comes to his kids..more specifically his youngest.
To this day, when she comes for supper she won't lift a finger to peel a potatoe, set the table, put a dish in the dishwasher or anything. It's a long standing house rule..that even my sons 11 yr old friends follow.when they stay for supper...take your plate to the dishwasher.
I think she just refuses to do it...to make a point to me.....because she knows I have issues with it.
It has caused arguments in the past, when she lived with us, but I don't give her the satisfaction of ruffling my feathers & causing friction with BF & me over a couple of dishes anymore.... for the amount of time I have to deal with her....not worth it.
It just reminds me of how lucky I am that she is out of my house forever and instead of getting frustrated...I can smile at the thought of it!!!!
That is totally unfair...
That is totally unfair... Poor son. SD needs to work for her money and stop giving it to her on a silver plate. Husband needs to seriously think about what he is doing.