And if it were your kids?
The lawyer is filing a case against Inbred, she will call DH once a court date has been set. In the meantime DH has used what is going on to try and change somethings in our house. Well, actually one thing. Redface Magee.
He wants him to spend the night every time he gets STA now.
I told him no. I hate what Inbred has done, I know it hurts him not to see his other two children but that doesn't change who Redface Magee is, what he's done, and what he's capable of. I reminded him that even if I were to agree my kids would not stay here. They would call their dad and go to his house.
DH - Well you're mommma, tell them no it's your time and you want them home.
Me - Yes I could, but I'm not going to. I'm scared for myself when he's here, why would I put my kids at risk? Why would I make them miserable? It's not their fault you and BM1 do nothing about how he acts.
DH - You make it sound like he's some kind of serial killer.
Me - And you try to make it sound like he isn't growing into one.
I stood firm, the answer is no. If my kids are home he is not to come over here. He tried guilt, and yes I do feel horrible but I can't put my kids in danger because he had two other kids with a psycho bitch who ran away.
Me - It's not my fault or the kids fault that she did that. You knew how she was before you knocked her up the first time. Then you figured since one baby didn't calm her crazy here's a good idea I'll knock her up one more time cause surely that'll work. Take a good hard look at everything Redface has done, to me, to my kids, to our house and to our animals. Think long and hard about it and ask yourself this; If one of my boys had done half of that stuff to you or your kids would you really keep bringing your kids to the lions den?
*Silence*
Then how do you expect me to be ok with you bringing the lion to us?
*More silence*
He got up and left. I don't see this as being resolved. I really don't know what he's planning to do. If any of what I said sunk into his thick fat skull. I'll have to wait until Friday night and see who comes home with him. This morning I made reservations for me and the kids at a hotel near by just incase. It has an indoor pool and cable and room service so if he does show up with both boys, we'll have a mini staycation. And yes the dogs will be coming with us.
- Evil stepmonster's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
I will admit he has tried to
I will admit he has tried to get him proper psychologists and mental exams, but BM1 has final say on all medical treatments and exams and she will not allow Redface to be seen by any other doctor than the one she chooses.
DH has just fallen into her habbit of it's not my special little baby's fault, it's every one around him who treats him as if he's not a king.
I've tried telling him, I
I've tried telling him, I don't think it'll sink in until something like this does happen(me leaving)
I think he is too. I worry
I think he is too. I worry about what will have to happen for both DH and BM1 to finally see that he needs serious help.
I know, but letting him get
I know, but letting him get away with everything he does is only going to make sure someone is going to end up seriously hurt..or worse.
Is she afraid of something
Is she afraid of something coming out in therapy? BM here was but she had no say with the treatment.
She, along with DH both have
She, along with DH both have relatives with some serious mental disorders. She doesn't want him labeled crazy or possibly being put in a home. She'd rather tell everyone he has aspergers and make excuses for everything he does and tell him it's not his fault, he's special and people just need to figure out how to deal with him being special.
I completely understand the
I completely understand the stance that you have taken from reading your other post. My question is, how long can this go on? At some point paying for hotels and/or not seeing your kids because they don't want to be around the RFM isn't going to be an option you want to live with (at least it would grow old with me). Are you thinking about living seperate from your DH until RFM matures enough to be around humans (and animals for that matter)?
It's a really crappy situation, I'm sorry you and your kids have to deal with this.
I've thought about it here or
I've thought about it here or there, but not seriously, and haven't had any talks with DH about it. It was working, RFM would spend the night once a month when my children were gone, on the weekends he didn't have his kids he would go pick up just him and spend the day with him, and that seemed to make everyone happy. But now he seems to be trying to wiggle RFM back into the mix with everyone and that just can't be done. The last time he was here he tried to get me to watch him so he could go into work for a call and I told him no, I've told you he doesn't act right when you are not here and I will not be alone with him. He gets butthurt but nothing I can do about that.
Yeah, they'll never give a
Yeah, they'll never give a strait answer because (just in my opinion) they don't really want to think about what they would do if it was their kids put in these situations.
I've told DH the same thing.
I've told DH the same thing. When RFM destroyed his classroom and broke windows over his jacket the school told BM1 no charges will be filed if she pays for what he destroyed, she had the nerve to ask DH to pay half. Then he had the nerve to actually consider it. Nope, I told him if he wants to run behind RFM always paying for his cover ups then we need seperate accounts because I'll be damned if my money pays for any of that. Thankfully he declined.
No you don't, not at all. I
No you don't, not at all.
I guess one of the factors that bothers me so much is that if this was a friends kid, or a nephew after the first act of violence I would have banned that kid from my house. But RFM came back several times, each time something new, each time HE would be consoled and told how he wasn't a bad kid and he was loved very much by everyone.
No..I don't love him, I know my kids don't love him, and we've been very honest about this with DH. I should have stopped the interaction with my kids at the first sign. Then I finally realized, I had to get deep and dirty with my thoughts and be brutally honest. If one of my boys had the same mental disorders and violent outbreaks as this kid does would I send him away and keep him from his brothers.
Yes I would.
I would not abandon him, of course he would feel like I did and that would kill me but I would not let him live in the house with us any longer. I would make sure he got help, even if that help meant he had to stay in group home with professionals who know how to handle this. I would do that to my own son, so why the hell am I letting this kid come in and terrorize my kids. Now I don't, but I should have taken that stance much sooner than I did. I hate to be cliche but I really thought we could work it out and be a brady bunch. Boy was I a dumb ass.
Thank you Sweet Pea, And I'm
Thank you Sweet Pea,
And I'm starting to wonder if it will ever be over. Hell, is it skeeter that talks about SD55? Or something like that? I can't imagine having to deal with this shit for that long. I was slightly prepared for the 13 years DH has left but it continues after?
You know, it took me longer and I had to go through so many interviews to adopt a dog, but they let any and every one pop a kid out and raise it.