Would love input. How much should BM call DH?
Ok. Heres the deal. BM is calling/texting/emailing my DH faaar too much for my comfort!!! She will also ask my DH if 'shes' around-- meaning me!!! She wants private convos with my DH!!! She told him this last week. Shr will call him at work too so that Im not around. Grr.
My DH does NOT text her back unless less Im aware of it. Same with calls & emails. Long story short. She almost broke us up before we got married with the same crap. He had to choose. His future or his past. He choose me of course. All was pretty quiet until about 6 mos ago. Now shes back at it. I think she thinks DH still holds a candle for her. He doesnt.
What is she calling about? To whine & complain that the kids are giving her a rough time!!! But she doesnt discipline them!! Her DH was handling the boys until about 6 mos ago & it shows!! Problems in paradise Im guessing. DH tries to offer her ideas- but she shoots them down. She also likes tp call at night or while hes at work which is highly inappropriate as he is a 'first responder" (being careful due to privacy).
She needs to learn to Parent the kids at her place!!! We are a state away! What does she want my DH to do??
What say you?
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Comments
Unless it is an emergency she
Unless it is an emergency she shouldn't call him at all. NADA ZIP ZILCH
If she has anything to say it should be by text or email.
She sounds a right annoying PITA, and as long as your OH doesn't answer or reply hopefully she will get the message. Just let him send the calls through to voicemail, and she can leave a message, if needed he can text her back.
Your DH needs to set the
Your DH needs to set the boundaries. What she is asking for is inappropriate and disrespectful of you. No way would I tolerate that from my so or BM. If it continues I would rip both her and DH. A new one ((((hugs))))
BM is refusing to take DH's
BM is refusing to take DH's advice because if his suggestions worked, she would have no other reason to call him. BM is using the skids to get DH's attention. Probably in her mind, she's getting off on pretending to be the "other woman" by asking if you're around. Who really knows what goes through their sick minds.
DH needs to tell BM that she can call him only for medical emergencies. Other than that, there really isn't any reason to call him. The skids are in another state, then she has to put on her big girl panties and parent her children.
Im kinda torn with this. I
Im kinda torn with this.
I only speak to and will only speak to my ex when he is alone when it is in reference to our girls.
The reason being? My ex husband probably could not get dressed in the morning if a woman didnt tell him how and when to do it. And even though I like his wife, she has had a tenadancy to be "all up in" decisions that had nothing to do with her.
If you are secure with him what do you care?
Thanks so very much for the
Thanks so very much for the responses!! I appreciate it.
Why do I care that she calls & texts my DH non stop? Cause its wrong, its extremely disruptive & cause its her pushing normal healthy boundaries. Im quite secure in myself- its Not an issue of me being "insecure" Its simple to me-- she wants to cause problems!! What on Earth does she need to talk to MY DH secretively? IMO-- thats beyond shady!!! & not healthy at all. Esp to her own marriage!!! Its time she learns to put on her big girl panties & learn to Parent!!! My DH cannot control what happens in her home-- thats Her issue!!!
Thanks so much everyone!!! I feel better about things now & will have a very honest talk with my DH. Time to put the boundaries back in place-- email Only!!!
I needed to read this today
I needed to read this today as I just had this SAME problem this morning. Bm called at a time I'm usually not around but this morning I was, he ignores it. I explained how it kinda looked shady that he didn't answer just bc I was there, he says it was "out of respect for me and that anything she needed to say about the kids she could text" I understand that I guess. She told OSD that she called "to make sure they made it to school" FFS, he knows how to get them to school, sounds like a cop out to me.