sd14 in the theraputic home...not much of one. they can't really get a grip on her either. I told DH yesterday I was going to disengage told him what that is going to look like. he said why? I said for one she is not going to work on a relationship with me. she has proven it and by her not doing it and my feeling being so damn sensitive it is making me feel worse. so take me out of the equation maybe if shes not forced to "like" me she will work on a relationship with you. I am going to tell her all of this in family therapy tomorrow. Im going to tell her you just make sure anytime you "need" something you talk to your father. Im done. and unless father or the counsler asks me to come back to counsling i will not be going. i will apologize for the things i have done wrong. but im not going to grovel for forgiveness. I am also going to break my one rule. mention bio mom as the dead beat she is and that treating me like crap does not drive me away so that she will "come back" if she wanted to come back she could. it has absolutley nothing to do with me. she left when she was two i married DH when she was 9. I never thought i would become the person who just didn't want to be a mom.especially after being adopted and finding great parents who took me in as their own. but i guess the stupid girl wants to use that against me too. DH is a little upset when i said she will be comming home soon becuase she is a good manipulator. but shes your daughter. you take care of her. our job is to keep the boys safe and away from that behavior.