Happy New Year! I haven't posted in a long while but I read everyone's posts about every day. 
I have been retired for 18 months and my DH retired about two years ago. 
A few things step related to vent about for the moment. 

My MIL has been in the hospital since last week with very serious heart problems. They are doing surgery tomorrow to put in stents in blocked arteries. I am not really close with her but pray she gets better. I lost my mom in 2021 and miss her every day. DH is of course very concerned. 
His OSD that lives out of state called him the same day his mom went in hospital. OSD was calling to say she was on way to see her BM that lives in next town over. She drives right through our town less than two miles from our house. She is calling only because her son that I have never met was asking about the mural I painted in town as they passed by it.  Did DH even know she was coming up to our area? No. Did she have any plans to spend time with DH on this trip? No. 
Is she the daughter that gives him grief if she hears that he sees his local grandchildren more than her two kids? Yes she is! 
So anyhow DH tells her that her grandmother is in the hospital. Does she make any plan to go see her or 90 yr old grandfather? No she does not. 

I told my DH that day right after the call that I did not want OSD coming by our house for a driveway visit, she has in The past done so to drop off kid photos or see our dogs. I said she gave you no notice she was coming this way (3 hr drive to get here from her state), she calls to ask about my mural for her son I have never met, she made no plan to see DH. I told DH that it triggers me for a person who I do not exist for to come anywhere near my home. I have no relationship with her or the YSD or MSD, I do not exist in their eyes. So I said if she does say she is stopping by for something that you will have to go meet her somewhere else. I think he got the message this time.  I said I am done with the Bulls@$t of dealing with the people who have treated me badly and just went on with their lives like nothing happened. I said we have been the ones to pay the price of the estrangement and the way our lives as grandparents are not what they would have been...in a normal way. 

Today the YSD40 calls DH and as I am sitting right next to him and she is very loud on the phone I hear everything. She had gone to see her grandmother for a brief visit, she only stayed there for 10 minutes. She says that her older sister OSD actually said that she hadn't seen her grandparents in eight years so she would not be seeing her grandmother before this serious surgery. OSD also made a comment that she guesses she would have to come back for the funeral. She also complained that the grandparents never visited her when they lived 45 minutes away from her in other state.  For goodness sake they were in their 80's when they lived there. 
I think, YSD heard all these comments of OSD through the he BM who fuels this alienation of the sisters, my DH and his parents. 
 

I have been pretty vocal the last few days about the step dysfunction situation and I am done with pretending. I will call it as I see it. DH is seeing how his daughters all turned out, they are all over 40 yrs old.  Maybe the YSD is closer to him but she never asks how he is, the relationship seems very transactional, gifts for grandkids, etc. I was surprised she even went to see her grandma. And even then when she talked to DH afterwards she just mostly went on about the OSD. And she was on the phone in the bathroom with him...'she had to pee' ...smh...for decency sake.  
 

So first day of the year and I've been compelled to vent about skids. I just want a peaceful retirement years. I plan to visit my kids and grandkids more this year. Not letting skids rent space in my head from now on.  

I am very thankful for this group, you all have kept me sane for almost 12 years. Time flies when you are having fun! Mmmph! 
May your New Year be blessed and peaceful! 
 

update: MIL had cardiac cath surgery this morning (Tuesday )and is doing well. Kidneys are ok and they put in all the stents this time that they needed to do. Now just to recover and hopefully be able to go home soon. Thanks to everyone for the well wishes and prayers for her.