BM called CPS
Everything was nice and calm for a couple of months.
I have to say, while SS8 was here for the Holidays I was pleasantly surprised as he was MUCH better behaved than he has been in the past. He wasn't perfect, we still had to ask/tell him things a million times, and his manners were still not great, but there were no outbursts, or stealing, or lying or general ugliness this time around. I even told him and DH the same while we took him home after his visit, and I'm not one to hand out random compliments.
Anyway... CPS showed up on my doorstep today while DH was at work to ask about DH and SS8.
He couldn't tell me what the supposed "Incident" was or who it was reported by other than the fact that it was reported out of BMs town of residence. (Duh, guess who it came from.)
I of course cooperated and answered all questions to the best of my knowledge.
I was so shocked that he was here that it completely left my mind to tell him all the concerns I've had over BM and SS8.
There wasn't much for me to say otherwise. SS8 is treated exactly the same as my BS2. Except Discipline for SS8 is handled only by DH as I am trying the disengagement thing. (Discipline consists of time outs and quiet times) DH has never struck SS8, NOTHING that could lead to CPS. I have no idea what's going on.
And of all days to come calling they come on Valentines Day...
I called DH and he was absolutely dumbfounded. He was so upset I could hear him holding back tears.
That witch is ALWAYS trying things to get him in trouble. Either she's making it up to hide something or upon SS8's return home he told her lies, and/or what he knows she wants to hear. "daddy's mean, blah blah."
I'm ready for DH to be done with them. Nothing good has come from BM or SS8 except heartache for my DH. It makes me sick.
Our first Valentines Day as a Married Couple has been ruined. They ruin everything.
Anyway... I think she's up to something. What could be going through her head?
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this is true... every time
this is true... every time BM1 got hotlined (which has been MANY) CPS contacted DH because he is the father of one of her kids.
(((HUGS))) CPS likely wont
(((HUGS))) CPS likely wont find anything. That likely isn't much of a consolation when you're going through something like this, but it's true.
You could, however, consider turning the tables on BM and reporting her to CPS. Especially if you believe she is neglecting SS.
Thank you. I'll have to
Thank you.
I'll have to really start documenting things with pictures and such, as when he's sent to us he is ALWAYS ill with something. From a bad case ringworm to foot and mouth disease.
And to the other comments, yes unfortunately he did tell me it was to investigate DH specifically.
He even tried to ask my two year old questions and took a picture of him. (of course he didn't understand the questions, he just kept offering him cars to play with)
This doesn't seem legit at
This doesn't seem legit at all. Are you sure he wasn't just some spy for BM? I'd call the agency & report his behavior.
Yes. Is that weird? He said
Yes. Is that weird? He said they do it in all cases?
He left a business card with all his information on it.
I've never dealt with anything like this before
Call the local CPS agency &
Call the local CPS agency & check his credentials. It seems odd to me.
Does his card look legit? Does he have a badge?
Call and check, STAT. Special
Call and check, STAT. Special investigator? Sounds more like private eye. And not all of them do things legit, they sometimes say anything and everything to get the information they're after.
Yes, you need to check with
Yes, you need to check with the CPS agency on him. He could've made up that card to try to fool you. People do it all the time.
You say SS comes over all the time with illnesses. Bring him to the doctor/ER every time and get copies of the documentation from that.
Really wish we could cancel.
Really wish we could cancel. DH bought us tickets to a concert that going on tonight. I've just got to figure out a way to get his mind in a happy place. Although Maybe I will plan an extra surprise date night also.
Thank you
Please note that if CPS was
Please note that if CPS was called on her, as above poster said - theyw ill visit you as well. The "incident" they can only discuss with your DH may be something BM is accused of.
In fact I would lean towards
In fact I would lean towards this because if it was an accusation against your DH 9/10 times they would be able to tell you that since you are his wife. However since you have no legal guardianship to your stepchild or BM, they can't tell you about the kids issues with BM.
Has your DH contacted CPS for
Has your DH contacted CPS for more information?
Yeah. The card he gave me
Yeah. The card he gave me seems legit, says he's a special investigator.
Should they have called first?
I think there is usually a
I think there is usually a phone to schedule a home visit in our state. Idk if that's always true though... idk
They do not always call
They do not always call before they come. Depending on the accusations against your DH catching you off guard prevents you from covering stories, cleaning the home, etc. I have been there done that. Ding Dong called DCFS on my current husband many times and the NEVER called to tell me they were coming.
I actually just called to
I actually just called to make sure. Apparently he's legit as well as his actions and questions.
She must have really given them a story
Thank you. Good to know that
Thank you. Good to know that I can get the documentation, will definitely be requesting it all.