Bday party fr her this last Saturday. Turning 17. Something felt off when i spoke to dh found that sd asked that i not attend her bday. Why- because a week ago i came home early and found her and boyfriend at the house. The rules are no dates without adults home, so i told her. I also let her know that i was recording our convo simce she likes to say i am yelling and irate to dh. Suprisedly i am not like this at all with any of the 3 other kids. However he always believes her pout and i am left defending myself against them. With that she did not want me there. Ok well that in turm made both the other boys still in the house refuse to attend. I hated it because my mil had worked hard to make a meal and now we were not coming. I told my dh he could have told her - nonshe is my wife amd will be there- again he fell to her. Mil spoke with me the day after telling me how disrespectful and unappreciatimg she was of her gifts. Sister in law left due to her arrogance. Also found she tried to infiltrate one of my friends to get to see her horse. Of course my friend did not respond. She said her ask was not an ask it was a do, her thought was you may be a princess in your story but not mine. I know i am snarky but i do not wish her bad. That is why i have boundaries and rules. Honestly i blame both grandmas and her birth parents. They are creating a monster that in real life is not going to get it. I feel bad for her in a way because it is like watching an accident happen but you have zero control. That said i will keep praying and this is not the end- there may be hope- but i am happy i now have boundaries.