Im back....
I had a wonderful weekend...I shopped, i rested...It was great....UNTIL...I came home...He was so pissed..He was mad..He told me that i need to get over my jealous behavior...That i was awful...That he paid her phone bill cause she is a college student...That he has done nothing wrong...Its all me of course...He took them out to dinner after graduation...I told him to do as he pleased i dont care anymore...He went to His DAUGHTERS graduation and i needed to just get over it...HE SAID WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO TELL THEM TO GO AWAY...So there ya go it will go on.
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Nicole, I also learned this
Nicole, I also learned this past weekend that I am fighting a losing battle when it comes to my 2 SDS'.
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin
Like I said before, your F
Like I said before, your F considers these girls his daughters. He's been in their lives since they were little, he's not going to just walk away from them. You'll either have to decide to live with it & get to know them, get involved with them, or decide to leave. They sound like they live there locally, so I don't understand how he's kept you separated from them, but I don't think thats right. He either needs to open up his whole life to you & include you or you need to WALK. I know how you feel, its hard dealing with kids that aren't really his...but it sounds like your anger is from him excluding you & not neccessarily the girls themselves?
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"
no offense Melissa.. but I
no offense Melissa.. but I really think that you should be the LAST person passing comments on this post.
OMG FIM!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i was kinda thinking that myself...
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
What.. Am I wrong?!?!?!
What.. Am I wrong?!?!?! lol.. She is a hypocite.. these are adult girls purposely shutting this woman out.. and this is a local in your face every day thing.. Melissa's is a 2 times a year, I cant handle Thanksgiving w/o freakin out, about (and this is MEANT to be sarcastic)"SS" not being HER DH's KID!!! OMG..
I just want this woman to have the benefit of someone walking the walk and talking the talk...
i was agreeing w u!!!!!
i was just cracking up that u said it bc i was soooo thinking that!
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
Oh.. I know you were
Oh.. I know you were agreeing w/me.. that is why I put the LOLs in.. I just cant take it anymore..
Nicole. I do get your frustration.. I would be hurt if I was NOT invited then told I was invited only after all was said and done. Not to mention that he has NO right to be mad at you for going off and doing your own thing, on a weekend that he wants to dedicate to those girls.. You have to do what is right for you. He just didnt want you sharing w/your gf's how lousy he is being.
I also think that if you live together and cohabitat and split bills, that you SHOULD be the person on his insurance policy.. if not all, then at least 1/2 w/the other 1/2 split between the two girls.
HELL NO!!!! You are 100%
HELL NO!!!! You are 100% right!!
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin
I was using the Am I wrong
I was using the Am I wrong for dramatical affect..
I just wanted to also point out HOW she is a hypocrite, in case she isnt sure HOW she is being one.
u are too funny!
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
I think its the pregnancy
I think its the pregnancy hormones.. I am tired of people's crap lately. lol
well if thats the case
then what is MY excuse???
oh wait...im ALWAYS tired of people's crap...tee hee
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
Oh, I'm pretty sure you
Oh, I'm pretty sure you meant offense by that. In my opinion, its you 3 that are the hypocrits. You tell me SS IS my husbands kid, DNA or not, because he helped raise him for 11 years, and yet Nicole's F has raised these girls for 15 years, since they were little, but THEY aren't "his kids"? Whatever you say...and the only reason I suggested to her that she try to get to know is because in her situation, these girls ARE local, the situation IS in her face on a daily basis, and he obviously is not going to walk away from them. So if she wants to stay with him, she doesn't have much of a choice. And from what she has said to me, these girls are not rude to her, they are not neccessarily the problem, its her F that was treating her like crap when they were around, not them. You girls are also hypocrits because you say to just not respond when you don't agree with something, yet I wasn't even writing to ANY of you and you still feel the need to start an arguement. Take your own advice,especially Bellacita...did you not PM me a few days ago & tell me not to let other people bully me & I have every right to state my own opinions on here just like every one else? Yes, I believe it was. Sorry Nicole, for once again the SAME people hijacking your post to talk crap to me.
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"
Hold on. I did NOT say
Hold on. I did NOT say those girls werent his. I said she NEEDED to be invited to these things.. I think you are having a problem reading as well.
I am not a hypocrite. I think perhaps you could look up the definition. I did NOT ONCE tell nicole that those kids shouldnt be in his life.. I said.. he should make sure she is included.. and for the insurance policy to split it w/the girls. THAT is what I wrote.. Perhaps you need to go reread what I have said.
As far as Bellatica and SSM.. they also are not hypocrites.. they dont tell people one thing, then write about how they cant do it themselves.. or have taken it to an extreme.. as have you.
Grow up.
Thanks hun, I got absolutely
Thanks hun, I got absolutely no sleep last night so I am unable to come up with a witty retort at this time!!
Nicole - my apologies to you as well - our intention was not to hijack your post. I am going thru a difficult time with my SD15 right now. I will pm you my situation.
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin
Go back to her old post,
Go back to her old post, where I said not to call them not his kids or she may get verbally attackd for it. Thats where you ALL said it was different. So if you're now saying you think she SHOULD consider these girls his kids, then why did you argue with me in the first place & why did none of you say anything to her about saying they aren't his kids, but you feel the need to tell me that? And I said the same thing to her that you just said, that her F should be including her in his life, not keeping her separate. I don't see how thats being a hypocrit. But whatever. And Bellacita DID tell me not to respond to something I don't agree with it and not to let people bully me, yet she turns around & joins in on your guys verbal attacks when you don't agree with something I say. Maybe YOU should look up the definition.
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"
Again.. you apparently can
Again.. you apparently can not read. I never even responded in that post. READ what I WROTE before making your snide comments..
I dont care if you respond if you dont agree.. What I do care about is you being a complete and utter hypocrite to Nicole. She needs empathy and support.. Not judgement from someone that can not TOW THE LINE!
I went home last night and described both you and Nicole's situations to my dh and how they have been handled.. He was appalled by YOUR behavior Melissa.. NOT Nicole's. He agreed that Nicole should continue living her life as she likes, IF she isnt being included or acknowledged.. I then told him how YOU Melissa responded to her post.. w/o any prompting, he was like.. WHAT A HYPOCITTE!!
So its not just a handful of us that think you are being in this instance.. Its a lot.. just a handful have the nerve to call a spade a spade.
Nicole I am truly sorry. I want you to get sound advice and not be preached to by someone that isnt following her own surmon. I stand by the advice I gave Nicole, which is live your life if your not being included, that he had NO right to be upset that you made other plans while he was otherwise engaged this past weekend... and that you should revisit the insurance policy or ask him to get some seperate coverage that covers at least half of your joint debt and the cost to bury him should something happen.
okay FIRST of all
DO NOT call me a hypocrite bc i didnt say ANYTHING about nicoles SDs NOT being "his kids"...all i was saying is that i thot it was funny that U were saying to her the same things that U got mad at all of US for saying to u???
second, YES i did tell u not to stop blogging bc u didnt like what people said...what does that have to do w this??? all i meant was that in a public forum, sometimes u are going to get responses u dont like and dont let that deter u. and just bc ur SS doesnt live close and hers does, does not mean hes any less than the ur husbands kid.
i give up...i wasnt the one who started the argument but i do NOT appreciate u talking about my friends like that or me for that matter. if u REALLY cared about NOT hijacking her post, u wouldnt have responded here, would u?
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
men suck!
That's all I have to say about that!
Girl, you did not try to keep him from going to the graduation
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
You just wanted to be invited...that's all, and that is not jealousy. It's wanting to be included, as his F. And he's twisting it now, to suit his own needs.
You have the trump card. You can walk away if this continues. He needs to either grow some balls and put you where you belong-which is right beside him, or you need to think about movin' on.
He said
That i was invited to Graduation...Haha funny thing, my name was no where on the invitation sent by the Ex
As I recall, you were treated with indifference when
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
you tried to join in at dinner with his D. Does he not care at all about how you would feel, after that incident, showing up at graduation without being invited?
He's in fantasy land, not wanting to admit to what's going on here, and trying to guilt you into just taking it whenever he and they (the d's) want to dish it up.
Wrong.
Well he told me
that He knew he should have never went to Graduation...He knew there would be trouble...And yes i was hurt at first, then pissed and now i Dont give a big F****......Turn about is fair play...
Nicole.. hopefully he
Nicole.. hopefully he remembers this when you dont get invited to the next thing.
Yes
and thats so true...They are both attending college and dont get me wrong thats wonderful that they have chosen to go and better their lives..But they do not wrong...They are in college thats why he pays their phone bills and goes on and on about them...If the table where turned and he and i split, do you think he would have anything to do with my daughter like he does these girls?? NO she would never see him again...They are the same to him as my child.......AM I WRONG??
Okay, being in college, I
Okay, being in college, I guess I can see paying for the phone, but if I recall correctly, this bill was hundreds of dollars. My cell phone is 63 a month, and I never use all the minutes. If I were him I would pay that base plan for her, and she's responsible for the overage. She has NO limits clearly, and just forwards the bill to daddy!
I hope that's not true about your daughter and what he would do for her, that is truly the saddest thing of all if that is the case....
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Albert Einstein
Brats grow up to be
bitches & assholes. I think that these girls fall into this catagory. It is the parents responsibility to teach & ensure that the kids no matter how old they are treat adults with respect. Nicole your boyfriend feels like he is theri dad as he helped raise them & there is nothing wrong with that. What is wrong is treating you like second class. For me this would be a deal breaker. That & his big baby fit about your doing something with your friends that weekend.
This is what I would call a sign. Your not married & can do better.
Sounds to me like HE needs to get over it!
Wow, you think he'd be THRILLED the love of his life had a GREAT TIME over the weekend while he tended to his adult brats.
Instead, HE threw a tantrum...think ya hit a nerve, Nicole, he KNOWS that YOU can live without him. Sounds good to me!!
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."-Eleanor Roosevelt