From what I was told about her before we met, I felt she was a worthless human being. I gave her the benefit of the doubt though as most information came from my husband and we all know people usually only talk about the bad in others who have wronged them. However, he was right.

He hadn't saw the three children him and BM1 had together in about 8 years when he located his oldest daughter on MySpace. She wanted to see him. I had previously doubted his claims that he tried so hard to see his children until I went with him to the courthouse to file papers to have BM1 held in contempt for breaking his court ordered visitation. It was then I learned (from court records) that he had filed the same paperwork over 60 times. BM1 had a warrant out for her arrest since 2005. Yet nothing was ever done. I'm not gonna say he fought as hard as I think he should've, but he wanted them.
After nearly a year of court we were finally able to see the kids. BM1 told me she thought he had left state, had no knowledge of any court dates she missed, and no clue about any warrant. I knew she was lying but let it slide to keep the peace.
She had two more children in addition to my step kids with another man who she had recently broken up with. My step kids called him dad.
We began regular visitation and seemed to be getting along pretty well.
Trouble began after about six months. SD14 told me that BM1s ex boyfriend (the one she called dad) had molested her when she was around 8 or 9. I spoke with SD13 who confirmed she had been molested as well at around the same age. I told their mother-she didn't believe them. I reported it to CPS. They felt the girls were lying. I truly believed them and still do. Shortly after SD14 began having sex with a 17 year old boy. Her mother let her move in with him and his parents. I located him and took her back to our house. She was supposed to live with us. Her mom wanted to "spend the day" with her after she was with us a week. She never came back and won't speak to me or her father. According to the other kids the boyfriend (now 18!!) is now living with them (BM1 and kids). Police and cps have been notified. Nothing has been done.
On to SS12. Everything with him had been relatively normal, he seemed to be a very good kid. That is until my 4 year old came to me and told me that SS12 "rubbed his weeny on me". I confronted him and he admitted it. I made him leave with the understanding that if he were to attend counseling he could return. DH set it up but BM1 refuses. She says nothing is wrong with him and he is just immature for his age. I feel that he was possibly molested by the same man as his sisters and the mother knows and doesn't want it to come out. I haven't pursued this issue any further as I am at a loss of what to do. If she's found guilty of covering something up, he'll be sent to live with his father and me. I know it's selfish of me but I can't put my child in that harm. I haven't talked to him since the incident. DH has tried to message him on FB but he won't answer.
Now for SD13. She has had a wild streak in her from the beginning. Normal teenage things for the most part. She was living with us up until last month when she went to visit her mother. She posted something on FB about being hungover and her father called to speak with her about it. She smart mouthed him at which time I chimed in and told her enough. I guess that pissed her off so now she isn't speaking to us either.

I feel like their mother doesn't care about them as long as they stay out of her way and don't cause any trouble for her. I know it's easier to judge when you're looking at someone elses life but these kids are a hot mess. I'm almost relieved that they aren't around my kids anymore even though I feel so wrong for thinking that way. I also can't stand for DH to be so hurt. He was so happy to have them back in his life only to have them gone again.