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I just dont get mean people

onebright1's picture

The text just keep coming. Now she is threatening to tell the IRS that he cheated on taxes which he didnt but just the thot of having to get all the paperwork together and the time it will take to deal with it....... geeeeeez
As for the mean part.,., I got to school to pick up my BD6 and she was in tears becuz BM had just been in before me to pick up BF's D6x2(twins) and D10 and SD12 and she Told the Twins to "Get away from Lxxxx and stay away".
Then she starts with the text again to him about how she tried to call for an emergency and he wouldnt pick up and what a piece of crap dad he is for not caring about his daughter becuz she was sick at school and needed picked up. She only has these girls 4 nites a week! and by the time she picks them up from after care and gets them home fed and homework done on those 4 school/work nites I dont see where she is spending alot of time with them seeing how he has them from fri after school until he drops them back at school on Monday morn. And I dont see where that is an emergency to be ill at school. What if he didnt live close by? what would she do then?
Sooo anyway, then later he leaves his job to go to the oldest d15 soccer game. After the game he has to chase her down in the parking lot as she is running for BM's van. ( i didnt go with him as he feels it upsets the the 2 older kids) He finally catches up to her and she says" leave me alone, Im gonna be late for an appt.vI have to go to therapy becuz of YOU!"
Is there anything he can do to stop this woman from alienating his kids from him? From posting garbage for all (including his girls) to see on the internet? He is out of money for a lawyer because she dragged this out for over a year and constantly called her lawyer 2 and 3 times a day everyday for that year(her lawyer said this).
I just feel so bad for him....I have never dealt with anyone like this .... dunno what to do.

Comments

DaizyDuke's picture

So since it sounds like legal options are out right now, I would do this:

Ignore her! Ignore her threatening texts, ignore her annoying comments, ignore her angry outburts. Once she realizes she does not have an audience for her drama she will most likely stop. While you are ignoring her though, document everything should her behaviors escalate, you may have no choice but to get legal help.

Pray that her therapist can help her get over her anger/resentment issues.

Not that it really matters, but why is she so resentful of her ExH? Why does she say she needs therapy because of him? She is obviously trying to make his life as miserable as she possibly can out of hatred for something (real or imagined) just sucks when innocent bystanders (you and your BD) get dragged into the mess!

onebright1's picture

The one who made the comment to him about therapy was his 15yo daughter as she was running for BMs van after the soccer game.
And we do ignore her. He doesnt reply to her text.
BM has told the kids that their dad and her would have worked things out if there was no me.
She left him and filed for divorce and moved in with a man she was cheating with while they were married. (she is still with this man) Then 6 months later I met him and when the kids met me they told their mom about me and it has been hell ever since....... my bf said she was this way before me too, But I think it escalated when he got with me. I just dont understand a parent who wants to hurt their own children and that is what she is doing...

DaizyDuke's picture

Unfortuantely I think they just get blinded by their hatred and don't care who they take out in their quest for "justice" Instead of getting angry about something like normal people do and then moving on, they let the anger fester and grow until it reaches epic proportions and it just becomes all they know.

Well since I misunderstood WHO was going to therapy, I would hope and pray that BM would get some therapy! I can't believe her BF that she lives with puts up with her life revolving around making ExH life miserable. He must be a saint!

zuzieq611's picture

Everything Daizy said plus, put blocks on your cell phone and e-mail. BF obviously can't cause he's got to be reachable for the kids. 15yr old is being a drama queen, she'll be acting like nothing happened in a week. Sounds like BM is very angry, our BM was the same way, left with another guy, it was a full year after she left that I met DH. Then she starts telling the kids same thing, SHE (meaning you) broke up our home....she even tells skids that they are still married and marriage to me is bigamy....It's almost like they think they can prance off with other guys and expect that the Husband or SO will still be there just waiting for their return. They don't want them, but they'll be darned if they want anyone else to have them.

onebright1's picture

I am gonna try the harassment charges.But really he should be the one to do that, cuz all these text are to his phone, They are usually about me and my daughter though. I really dunno how to go about it, but I am sure I can figure it out.
And yes! it is just like your BM. Our BM tells his girls to treat me and my BD badly. I can tell the younger ones dont want to do it and they dont. They even look a bit embarrassed about it when thier mom behaves that way and they are only 6 years old.
AS for her BF, Because of what I know about her, I tend to think she is playing the victim with him and has him feelin sorry for her and wanting to "rescue" her. Cuz she has made up some dooozies and been caught on recordings Saying stuff about what she will do or say to the authorities that are outright lies about BD but "they dont know that"
I just wish I knew someone who has dealt with a BM like this that could tell me it will get better........

onebright1's picture

Thats EXACTLY what is goin on! I dont speak to her or really even spend any time with his kids. Just a moment here and there.
Is it still going on with your crazy BM? Cuz I am a patient person, and sometimes I do get ticked at BF for not defending me or my child, But he refuses to talk to BM or answer her neverending text unless it is to answer a direct question about the kids and then sometimes he ignores those too if he thinks she is just reaching for an excuse to text him. He does write them all down, but I dont see what good that will do him...
Thanks for your advice, it is good. It is hard not to let the wackyness affect you tho when it is directed at you and those you love.