So I haven't written in a while, and things had been relatively quiet around here until last night.

So, SD's Biodad is involved with a woman since late last year. Anyway he asked her to move in a couple months ago. He told my DW about this I guess just to let her know that this woman would be in SD7's life now. My suspicion is that her moving in is more motivated by the fact that he is a loser who can't keep a job, let alone pay his rent and bills, meanwhile she is a recently graduated nurse who has a decent salary. Anyway, off-topic.

From the first time I met this woman, I did not get the warm-and-fuzzies. Really the first time I met is when we had a phone conference call with SD7's teachers because of issues SD7 was having at school. BioDad tells DW he is bringing GF along to our house, where we will call from. DW and I were a little shocked since they'd only been living together a month at that point, but whatever. If she is going to be in SD7's life, I guess she can be involved - not my battle anyway, that is up to DW. So during that phone call she keeps throwing her two-cents in about how we can improve SD7's grades and behavior at school. BioDad barely said two words, but this woman really wanted to be heard.

Next we learn that this woman has listed SD7 as her "daughter" on Facebook. A little premature, seeing as how they aren't married, but I guess not a big deal.

After a couple months of this GF living there, SD7 tells us that she wants to just stay with us all the time and only go to her dad's house EOW. Out of the blue she tells my DW that, with no prompting. So we're thinking either 1) something bad is happening over there, or 2) maybe the new GF put that in her head. Well, it turns out that this new GF has a daughter too, who is apparently a little developmentally disabled. So the daughter is living with them too, and BioDad already had his mother living with them.... this is in a 2-bedroom apartment. So now SD7 has to share a bedroom with this other girl (who she likes in general). Anyway, SD7 then proceeds to tell me that this other girl is bullying her, saying mean things to her, etc. I tell DW and DW talks to her about it, comes away with the conclusion that it is just them learning how to live together. Ok, I won't pursue it then.

So then this GF starts emailing and texting my DW to tell her things that SD7 did at school, that she's sick etc. Basically stuff that BioDad used to do. Then, and I told my DW this was a BAD idea, she starts texting the GF about Sd7-related stuff, mainly because BioDad won't get off his video-game-playing ass long enough to do this stuff or answer the questions. SD7 gets sick, DW texts the GF to look at her (since she is a nurse). Again I told DW that was a bad idea, that nothing good can come of it.

So the point of this long story. The GF has been sending increasingly acrimonious texts to DW. The tone of these texts have been almost accusatory that DW is not a good mother. Last night DW lost it over one of these texts. Basically the GF texted that "Sd7 has a cough, and it has been there for a month - did you (he BioDad was also copied on the text) ever get her immunized? Is she up to date on immunizations? She probably has pertussis! Plus you never take her to the Dentist! And she says her ears are crackling!" The text went on and on about how SD7 is not taken care of, and really it was pretty accusatory, even in my view as someone who warned DW against texting directly with the GF. (Not to mention the fact that SD7 is a huge liar and constantly lies about being sick in order to get attention).

DW was pissed and called BioDad right away to see if he had seen the text and if he was aware of it. He said yes and that the GF was there with him at that moment. She basically asked him if he knew that Sd7 was up to date on all immunizations (he didn't, of course), if he realized they checked every time we take SD7 to the doctor (he didn't), if he knew we are paying for SD7's vision and dental insurance (he didn't), if he knew her dentist's name (nope), if he had ever made a vision or dental appt (no). So having established that BioDad isn't aware of anything to do with SD7's well-being, DW informs him that from now on she isn't going to speak to his GF and if GF needs to address this stuff, she needs to address it with BioDad. (I REALLY wanted to say "I told you so.")

So DW was fuming mad. I told her that the GF probably sees just how much of a Disney Dad that BioDad is and just assumes that my DW doesn't do anything for SD7 either except give in to her every whim. I knew that the GF was going to overstep her bounds at some point just based on her actions. It'll be interesting to see how it goes since BioDad told DW that he plans to marry this woman this year and that they are going to move 20 miles south because the GF's daughter has to go to a special school (he maintains this will have no effect on SD7 and getting her to school up here).

Anyway, learning experience for DW, and a moment that I'm sure many BM's and SM's alike have experienced.