You are here

Do you ever feel stupid/pathetic for staying?

sammmx's picture

Submitted by sammmx on Sun, 09/23/2012 - 5:05pm

I do. Lately I just feel so down about myself, like I'm taking the easy way out by staying. All this drama, feeling worthless and unloved. Like nothing I do or say matters.

SS3's birthday was Saturday and BM let us have him from 12-5. Which was fine but when we dropped him off we found out she was staying at a shelter (as we dropped him off AT the homeless shelter) and then she was mad at us because we were apparently supposed to bring ice cream for his birthday party (AT THE SHELTER) and we didn't. So of course BF was all upset and like crying and having one well of a break down, and of course I catch all the backlash. I opened my big mouth and said something negative about BM and all hell breaks loose.

Everytime I try and mention going to court to BF or something he freaks out at me like I'm stupid and that BM will come around and just agree to whatever he wants once CAS steps back. He's so blinded by her it just enrages me. I'm starting to realize no matter what I do or say, I will never compare to BM. I will always come after (in this order) SS3, SS9, SS9, BM1, BM2... then me.

Fuck my life, I seriously feel like such a piece of shit loser. Sad

Comments

oneoffour's picture

Submitted by oneoffour on Sun, 09/23/2012 - 5:53pm

Walk to the nearest exit.

Plan your escape. Then walk away. He really still wants things to work out with BM otherwise he would have told her that the ice cream was not his job. He isn't scared of her, he still cares about her.

klm1717's picture

Submitted by klm1717 on Sun, 09/23/2012 - 7:18pm

Don't berate yourself-you had the moxie to take on what I presume was already a bad situation, for love. I'm in a HORRIBLE situation (I'm going to post about it in a bit) but I sure as he11 am not blaming myself-so we got Duped, for 1 reason or another. Are we bad people for being optimists, & giving them the benefit of the doubt? No-THEY suck for taking advantage of us. I know I'M planning My escape..! I'm sure there's nothing wrong w/you-oneoffour is right-get out while you still have some sanity!

justanothergurlNJ's picture

Submitted by justanothergurlNJ on Sun, 09/23/2012 - 11:07pm

All the time. Pretty much every day of my life for the last 3 years. Nothing will ever change. We will never have peace she wont allow it and he wont set boundries. We will never have time together that doesnt get intruded on by BM and her none sence. He will never not take her call in case it is an emergency, which it never is. This weekend has been the last draw. I either lie down and accept being pushed aside when the GU calls or walk away. This is not how it should be I deserve a man that is going to make me a priority. I say this with a broken heart and tears in my eyes. Dont waste your time fight a fight you will never win no matter how in love you are.