Wow BM is f*cking ballsy... Court here we come.
I don't know how familiar you all are with my other blogs but short recap (in order of occurence from March-present):
- BM burns house down, admits to using drugs. SS2 comes to live with BF and I full time.
- CAS gets involved, permits BM one 3-hr visit per week with the children.
- SS9 comes to live with us full time as well shortly after.
- BM goes to detox for 1 week, passes 6 weeks of urine drug testing, is permitted one 24-hr visit minimum per week.
- BM gets a part time job, CAS investigates BM's house (aka a room she rents in her uncle's house) and approves it for children. BM is restored all her parental rights.
- Last week BM does not return children as agreed, talks to BF on the phone and they agree to a 50/50 one week on, one week off agreement.
So yesterday BM was supposed to bring the kids back at 5pm. I got home from work (at 5pm) and there were no kids. I asked BF what was up and he said he hadn't heard from BM yet, but she was probably taking the bus and it only runs every hour. I told him he should probably get ahold of her since the last bus runs at 6pm on Sundays, so he texted her. This is how the conversation went:
BF: Do you know what time you're bringing the kids at?
BM: I told you already they don't want to come... hello?!?!?!?!!!
BF: And I told you already, if SS9 doesn't want to come that's fine. We already agreed to this. I want to see SS2.
BM: I wanted to see SS2 plenty of times over the past 6 months and couldn't, he missed me terribly and you didn't care. I'm looking out for the best interest of my children and protecting them from abuse like any good mother would.
BF: Yeah, witholding them from their father is in their best interest... you're super mom alright. Bring me my kid now.
BM: No, you don't have any power over me anymore. I don't have to do anything for you. Why don't you worry about your other two kids and leave mine alone, k?
And BF freaking lost it. He was storming around the house muttering all kinds of obscenities under his breath. I told him to call the cops, but since there's no court order he didn't think there would be a point. We had SS9 (from BM2) with us this weekend and BM2 (who's actually a reasonable human being for the most part) happened to be here to pick him up when all this was going down. She gave BF the "go to court" lecture and between the two of us I think we knocked some sense in to him. He's going to call CAS today because he thinks she's on drugs again (BM in the past has supposedly been 'reasonable' when she's sober) and file a petition for custody. BM is broke so it's not like she'd be able to come up with a lawyer. We'll see what happens.
And on a side note - is it bad that I'm kind of excited for another week with no SKids? I mean the situation and circumstances suck but... I'm definitely enjoying the peace and quiet. Oooops.
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Comments
There is Absolutely NOTHING
There is Absolutely NOTHING wrong with being excited that you are skidless!!! Those are and always will be THEE HAPPIEST & BEST times in your life and marriage...just saying
Geez, she sounds like our BM
Geez, she sounds like our BM who is also an addict. He's right, the police wouldn't have done anything. Go to court for custody and ask for a drug test, most will do the test with hair, that way she doesn't have time to "clean up". Even once you get a court order though, the police will not get involved - at least in PA. If she defies the court order you have to go back to court and charge her with contempt. Enjoy the quietness now because it seems like you guys will have no problem having the kids the majority of the time.
You need a court order NOW.
You need a court order NOW. BM "kidnapped" (actually kidnapped him but not according to the cops that we called to get him back) ss when he was two about to turn 3. Took him from dh's mother's house and disapeared with him for five months. Five months later she dropped him off on our doorstep and said that "being a parent is hard". Didnt see her again for six months. Point of the story is this. When bm called dh, told him she took ss, told him that she wasnt bring him back ever, and taunted him about not knowing where she lived, DH immediately called the police. He spoke to the police in our county and he spoke to the police in BM's county. Both told him the same thing: there is no court order, she is the mother and she has done nothing wrong. DH told both sets of police that BM had not seen ss in over a year and he doubted that ss even knew who she was. Both sets of police repeated that she is the mother and since there is no court order, she has done nothing wrong. SS came back to us with severe attachment disorder issues, severe separation anxiety, depression, exhibiting sexual behaviour, and had regressed (he was now 3 and some change) to the developmental level of a 24 month old. It took THOUSANDS of dollars of therapy and YEARS before he returned to his normal self. BM scarred him for life. He still to this day exhibits shadows of the attachment problems and anxiety. BM thinks she did nothing wrong and it was her right to kidnap him. To this day. Im telling you this as a cautionary tale. Please get a court order. I beg you actually to get a court order. You do not want to go through what we have been through.