Refraining from fun stuff because BM is a Disney Parent
SD7 is IMO extremely spoiled at BMs. They go out to the movies almost every week she's there, to the mall to buy SD something new, out to eat, out to ice cream. I know this because every Monday I pick SD up for DHs week SD tells me what she did with her mom over the weekend and about the new stuff she bought.
I'll tell SD how lucky she is and that many kids don't get to do all those things. Her reply is always something like "Well it's just a normal week, it's really not anything SPECIAL" sometimes she even says stuff like "I don't even know why we go to the movies so much, it's my BM that wants to go, I don't even care about going to the movies"
Anytime DH and I think about taking her for a special treat (one of the things listed above) we know SD doest appreciate it and makes us not want to do it. I feel bad for DH because he's so frustrated with SDs attitude and wants to be able to give SD an occasional treat, as any parent does. But he usually holds off because he thinks it's over spoiling her because SD does so much with BM.
Any advice?
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Comments
None, I'm sorry there's
None, I'm sorry there's nothing that can be done about BM's overindulging SD. The only thing you can do is keep doing what you're doing. Teach her that's not the norm, treats are rewards for good deeds, and that you and her dad do not owe her any of it, but you like doing these things for her as special things. Good luck.
Very lucky for you your dh is
Very lucky for you your dh is concerned about this. And lucky for the child, of course. I wonder if advice to your thread will be slow in coming because most of us are dealing with dh's with the opposite problem!
My dh deals with the same.
My dh deals with the same. It is like bm is incapable of just being with sds, they are always doing some thing and the kids don't appreciate it. It has put a damper on a few outings when they say mom already took us here and she bought us more blah blah.
I think it has helped discourage him from being a Disney dad since he got sick of spending money just to hear about bm can do that at home for free! It doesn't hurt that my husband is a little cheap lol.
Agree- you dont have to spend
Agree- you dont have to spend money to build memories.
BM doesn't do ANYTHING with
BM doesn't do ANYTHING with my SKids, but we do have the problem with junk food. They eat pizza or some kind of fast food for every meal at BM's house. Get frustrating some times because after working 10hrs on Friday, driving an hour to get them and then driving home, it's late and some times I want to just order a pizza. But we feel bad because the kids will usually say they already ate pizza 2 or 3 times that week. I spoke to SS yesterday on the phone and he was eating pizza.
We have actually gotten to
We have actually gotten to the point where they tell me how much the love my cooking and it's their favorite. Took years of fighting at the dinner table and MAKING them eat what's on their plate to get to this point.