I actually had a good visitation weekend!
Just wrapped up our visitation weekend and it actually went really well.
DH had a leadership conference to go to on Friday evening and Saturday for most of the day. He tried to pick the kids up early on Friday evening, but BM refused (just to be petty, it's not as if she and the kids spend quality time together, she's usually not even home when he picks them up on Fridays).
The kids arrived, they both wanted me to show them their grades on the computer. One even let me help him complete a missing assignment. The other sort of lost interest, but didn't get upset when we talked about his grades that needed some work. We talked about how working hard was important.
They ate some leftover lasagna and actually cleared their plates. Then the three of us watched a movie until DH got home.
On Saturday, DH went to his conference, the kids and I had breakfast. Then we went to football game for one child. The game was near MIL's house, so we picked her up and she joined us at the game. BM was not there!!! It was so nice to not have to deal with any of that drama. After the game MIL took the two boys golfing. We went to her house for dinner and then met DH after his conference ended. When we got home, the boys readily gave me their clothes from BM's house, so I could wash them for them to wear home on Sunday.
On Sunday, I did my own thing until 1pm, then we all went to get pumpkins. Miraculously, there was no complaining that we didn't stay and pay for the expensive rides. We got our pumpkins and came home. Then we all relaxed a little bit - kids watched football and part of a movie and played video games with DH. Managed to get out of the house sort of on time. One kid forgot one of his football gear items (he brought it up to the television room and put it on top of our board games, for some reason), but we haven't heard anything about it.
I almost feel like I dreamt it, because we've never had such a weekend. No BM drama. The kids were happy to see MIL and MIL was happy to see them. We did not eat out for multiple meals. If weekends start being like that, maybe I could get used to this SM thing...not holding my breath though.
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DO you get now why we say 90%
DO you get now why we say 90% of skids bad behavior is due to the father... cause they do behave when there's not a parent around but they turn into evil monsters as soon as there's a parent around...
Oh and this is not because they are COD.. my own kid did it, behaved with family till I appeared then he turned into a brat, it's to show the other people, my mother is here now you can't touch me
Deigma only tried it twice and every time I cut his fun short with some punichment
but you are a good woman, I would've told DH.. sorry you will not be here for your children, I will not entertain them, they can stay with BM till after the conference and then you can collect them
While I might agree with you,
While I might agree with you, generally, they were even more well-behaved when he was around.
DH had a long and uncomfortable - for both of us - talk about how I feel unappreciated and I don't want to push everything aside when his kids are around. So, I think he may have said something to them in the car on the drive over. I also made sure to plan my own thing for most of Sunday, which helped. I think they all sat around waiting for me to come home, of course, but it was Sunday morning, which usually involve sleeping late and watching tv.
Also, it helped that I think BM was gone for the weekend, so couldn't try to create drama for us. She only sent DH one text over the weekend, which was micromanaging and annoying (about SS11's contacts), but that was it. I think SS11 might have called her on Friday night and she didn't answer, but he didn't have a melt down.
She tried to kick up some drama on Friday evening, by telling DH it was a "low blow" for him to want to pick the kids up early, but that was it.
Aw that is wonderful. Glad
Aw that is wonderful. Glad the visit went well and you had a great weekend.
Thanks! I'm not expecting
Thanks! I'm not expecting them to all go like this, but we'll see. I think the kids were also happy to spend time with their grandmother and exhausted from two busy days, so that helped, too. I also scheduled some things for just me, which I think helped my sanity.