Brief follow up to my last few blogs. The verdict is in. There was no abuse (called it). She was just scared of being kicked out and didn't have anywhere to go so she lied.  Not really surprised. 

ok now for the point of this blog. I recently encountered a young lady who  wants a divorce because he's way older than her and she's been being approached by younger, finer, and better (her words not mine) men. I though about sharing BM's story with her but quite frankly thinks she deserves whatever she has coming her way (her DH is a good man and really does love her), so I wil share it here instead. 

BM and DH were married a little over 10 years. She brought one child and he had 2. They then had one child together. She was very dissatisfied with their life. She wanted a new home, but couldn't keep a job. She felt she was above him and deserved better than what she was offering (keep in mine when they got together she was staying with her parents because she had no where to go). When SS was about 1.5 (around 2010ish) BM stopped coming home except to sleep. She stayed out all times of night and stopped contributing to household bills. After about a year she got bold enough where she didn't even try and hide her affair anymore. Would have her BF text and threaten DH. Just crazy stuff. 

At the end of 2011, she found out she was pregnant and officially left DH and HER children  (but that's neither here nor there). She briefly moved in with her BF and a couple of months later got her own apartment. They still stay together but she maintained a separate apartment I'm assuming for welfare purposes (the BF made too much for them to officially stay together and still collect food stamps and Medicaid (Medicare, not sure which it is, for the children). She left the vehicle she and DH had together in the next state over and bought a car of her own. At this point, DH is struggling to take care of all 4 kids (one of which isn't even his biologically) while BM is off living the high life with her new family of BF and new baby. Eventually BM gets her oldest child but he's almost immediately shipped off to his dad.
 

fot the next 3 years BM shows up to every visitation with her BF in tow to pick up SS. DH never complains. They eventually divorce in 2014. DH and I start dating in 2015 and get married shortly thereafter. Then all of the sudden she wants SS. She gets custody (cause vagina) and immediately buys a new car the first month she gets child support.  Even though she gets CS every month, she expects DH to continue to cover all costs associated with SS. That got nipped in the bud quick! 
 

After numerous break ups, her being put out, and a new baby by another woman for her BF, in 2019, BM discovers she is pregnant again. She immediately quits her job (because stress isn't good for the baby) and decides that DH owes her more money since she's not working. Doesn't take the baby daddy back to court, just DH. Shortly after, she loses her apartment but gets another through govt housing. She's not working so she loses that one too. She and BF officially stay together when baby is born at the end of 2019. 
 

in comes the poop storm that is 2020. BM is still not working, BF is tired of her crap. Cue lots of arguing and calls for DH to save her (not happening of course). He says he can't afford to take care of everything himself, and is working 2 jobs. SS is stealing from the BF so he wants him gone. She isn't cleaning the house and doesn't want to help with the baby. It's a mess.  It all hits the fan when he puts her out with no where to go. So now, here she is at almost 45, staying in a home she's about to get put out of because she won't follow the rules, with 2 extra kids and no family or friends to speak of. 
DH while not perfect is slowly but surely fixing our home which will be a rental property when we (eventually) get out new home built. The grass was indeed greener on the other side. But her DH not her.