DH and I are about to head out to a NYE party. While reflecting on where we were a year ago, I look back and realize that blended life is so F'd up. I find the control aspect morbidly fascinating in my situation:

1. Dr Evil's main preach to her lawyer and SD is that DH is "controlling"- He wants to control the situation, and control how often he sees his daughter. She has conditioned SD to believe that DH wants to control them both and take SD away from her.
2. Dr Evil wants to control DH and SD. She put all the "control clauses" in the CO. She wants to limit DH's time with SD and control what goes on over here.
3. I have no control over the PAS, no control over fully parenting SD. I feel helpless.

4. DH and Dr Evil divorced when SD was 1 and a half. SD feels she had no control over her parents divorce. It makes her upset and angry. But you know what the grand realization is?

SD has ALL the control. She has two parents twisted around her finger, who have catered to her and fought over her since the divorce. Both parents are too afraid of each other to co-parent, so SD has assumed full control via manipulation. She plays both back and forth, attempts to play me against DH, and has controlled what she wants to eat or do because her entire world has evolved around her (up until this year).

So. Many. Control. Issues.

Welcome Disengagement 2015!