My DH has been struggling with things that my SS’s are telling him that go on over at the BM’s house. Basically she’s a crappy mother, has never really cared or disciplined the kids in any way. According to my SS’s she is NEVER home. Leads a very active carefree life with her now BF while the kids stay at home and do nothing. My DH used to try and co-parent with her when the kids were little but she wouldn’t have any of it. In fact she used to deliberately undermine when my husband was trying to discipline the boys. Example: One of the boys was getting an F in a class. He called BM and told her that he has grounded the kid from video games at our house (the kid will play for HOURS) and wanted to know if she would do the same so that they could be on the same page. Long story short she told him to EFF off and what happened at her house was her business. Video games were her babysitter when the kids were younger. My DH and I would be watching a movie on Netflix through the X-Box and see SS log on to Xbox at 11:30PM on a school night. Well fast forward and now she has a live in BF who is 15 years her junior with no kids of his own. In fact, he is just 12 years older than my oldest SS. Apparently HE is the one who disciplines the kids at BM’s house. (Like ridiculous punishments though, grounding for a YEAR over something minor). All we hear about at our house is “Oh I can’t do that BF says NO” or “BF said that I have to do this or that”. It’s annoying the HELL out of my husband. LOL. I was telling him last night that his issue is not with the BF, it’s with BM because she allows this to happen. At the end of the day, what is he really going to do about it anyways? He cannot control what happens over her house. So this BF grounded my oldest SS(17) from his phone for the summer for whatever reason. SS is on BM’s plan so that’s her prerogative I guess. Well this weekend my DH went out and got my SS a prepaid phone to use. It’s like he is now the one doing the undermining! I just have to laugh at all of this. Everybody is so wrapped up in sticking it to the other one that they don’t realize these kids are not learning anything!