You are here

Step Parents does NOT mean doormat!

Ziggy's picture

62 yr old. I'm writing because I am shocked that someone else is going through all this pain (like me) with such a similar story. I am sorry for your pain and know what it's like for I, too, have been there. I married a man who's ex wife lives in this town. She's remarried but that hasn't kept her from making certain he doesn't have a wonderful life with me. She, along with their kids, are just full of hate - at it's directed at me. I've been married five years now The daughter (now 30) has yet to sit down and have a nice conversation with me. I've been (in my humble opinion) like an angel to these people. The son stopped speaking to us both after I refused to sign for a luxury sports car loan for him. The daughter is now mad that I am too close to her dad (my husband). She has stopped talking to him because of this. His ex even called here once when we had family here so that she could "warn" my husband of the fact that I married for money. The kids want all his money (yes, they're really superficial people) and I do suffer. I console myself with the fact that I am a) outnumbered and b) I'm no longer alone. My husband is beginning to see now that his daughter (the apple of his eye) is not always nice. He doesn't realize both kids are notorious liars. I have come to believe I need to move away from here to have a life of our own. I trust in the DNA of my husband that someday , eventually they will both come around. I also trust in the belief that people who consume themselves with hate and lies and who's purpose is destruction will probably have God's revenge by self destruction or something. Like you, I fell into a depression last year with his family staying here for months at a time and being told the "kids" problems have nothing to do with me. (I felt like I needed to leave this earth for everyone to be alright - the ex would stop, the kids would be temporarily happy and I wouldn't be making my dear husband's life less stressful). It's a difficult road this being a step mother. In my case, I have no other children. I am now happy about that because everything I looked forward to was an illusion. I have a lot of love to give but it's been all about worry instead. That's my parenthood. Worry. Why do they have such tiny hearts? Why don't they care about their dad? Why is the daughter such a whiney demanding thing? Due to our finances we've been unable to leave the home the ex shared with my husband, I sleep in the same bedroom, the "kids" think this is their home & when we're gone I've allowed (foolishly) them to stay here only to find the daughter slept in MY bed (as well as her own) and know they've gone through our personal papers, etc. I've prayed, asked for purification of my own soul so that I can continue to love these two, not have ill will towards anyone, etc. It's a struggle, however. Thanks for being here, thanks for surviving.

Comments