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sick 13 yr old

helpmeinwi's picture

My 13 yr old SS was sick from Tues-Sat....too sick to go to school, football practice, football game, or do his chores. But, miraculously, my DH took him to ex-wives house to trick-or-treat Sat. evening after being too sick to move off the couch, where he sat all day "being sick& infecting the rest of the house". I'm sorry, but I blew up. What are the rules in your houses regarding sick kids?

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ChaiLatte's picture

Maybe I'm way off base here, because I've never had a child but why is a 13 year old trick or treating? My SS is going to continue trick or treating as a teenager? I had no idea.

As far as your question, when SS is too sick to go to school, he has to stay in bed. No playing, and no video games. I doubt a parent would deprive their child of trick or treating, even if they were faking being sick. Isn't that some of the behaviors that come with the territory?

unbelieveable's picture

In "our" house - if you're too sick for school - you're too sick for everything else. No matter how old you are. It was the same way with me growing up. I missed bday parties, trick or treat, you name it. When you're sick - you lay on the couch with movies and nap. No junk - you eat soup - sick foods. No playing - maybe coloring. No running around...

It's not that he's 13 that concerns me. If I had my way - I'd still be trick or treating. We have tons of highschool, middle school, etc. kids that trick or treat here and hey, it gives them something to do, keeps them out of trouble. The problem is...if your kid is sick - he needs to be resting. Not eating candy and trick or treating? Did you go with them? My FH does not have any contact with BM unless I am around. Why would he take him over there? Has she not had 12 other years of costume memories? No reason for that visit...

helpmeinwi's picture

NO, I WASN'T EVEN ASKED TO GO ALONG, NOR DID I HAVE ANY IDEA THAT THEY WERE EVEN GOING UNTIL THEY ALL GOT UP, PUT THEIR COATS ON & LEFT...DEAR EX ALWAYS GETS HER WAY ON EVERYTHING...VERY CONTROLLING!

I_GOT_THIS's picture

What are the rules in your houses regarding sick kids?

the rule in our house for when my BS is sick is if he stays home or comes home from school he doesn't go outside to baseball practice or trick r treating or anywhere else. Also we try to keep the sick person confined to their room and spray lysol by the door ALOT. Sick kids don't lay on the counch at our house, hoggin up the TV and germing up the house.
Of course if it's the Skids it's probably different. We haven't really had to deal with them being really sick on our weekend. They've had cold and such and were sent with no meds but nothing's really slowed them down.

God will forgive me. It's his job.
~~Heinrich Heine

helpmeinwi's picture

I HAVE BEEN A STEP-MOM FOR 7 YEARS. I AM NOT ALLOWED TO DISCIPLINE THE KIDS, SET ANY RULES, SAY ANYTHING NEGATIVE OR IN A "TONE OF VOICE" THAT IS NOT SWEET & PLEASANT. WHEN CHORES DON'T GET DONE, THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES, I JUST END UP DOING THEM, OR MY HUSBAND DOES THEM. LATELY, THEY DON';T EVEN HAVE TO DO CHORES, BECAUSE IT WAS BROUGHT UP TO ME THAT THE KIDS DID TOO MUCH OVER THE SUMMER WHEN I WORK FULL TIME, AND THEY SHOULDN'T BE EXPECTED TO KEEP THE HOUSE CLEAN. I SAY MY HUSBAND IS TOO BUSY BEING THE "BEST FREIND" AND NOT PARENTING. THE 17 YR OLD CAN LAY IN BED AS LONG AS HE WANTS, BUT MY DAUGHTER (WHO NOW IS MOVED OUT) HAD TO BE UP AT 9AM, EVEN WHEN SHE WORKED UNTIL 3 AM THE PREVIOUS NIGHT. I AM TOLD I'M MEAN & DRINK TOO MUCH. DON'T EVEN MENTION THE WORD "JOB" TO THE 17 YR OLD....

bearcub25's picture

IDK. Last year SS14 (then) got kicked out of school for 2 days at Thanksgiving, i know he did it on purpose so BF would take him hunting earlier. Right on cue, BF stopped putting up the wood trim in our bedroom and ran to get him to take him hunting. And I put in my .02 and said he shouldn't get to go for 2 days instead of being rewarded.

So MY rules don't really matter anyway. And that is the last time I gave a single piece of advice regarding the sbrats.

buttercup123's picture

OMG, helpmeinwi. I'd go on strike. If I had to work all day and then clean up after ss...I'd freak. Everyone contributes in a family. Your DH needs to set soem rules and parent. He isn't their friend, he's their dad. Seriously, duh. You have every right to be upset.

Your step children will end up useless. Good luck when they actually have to get up early and hold down a job.

helpmeinwi's picture

oh, it gets better....DH just got laid off from his job...so I spent all weekend cleaning, because I'm not sure how many more weekends I will have. I took a part-time job at Koh's to make ends meet...& I was the Bitch for cleaning this weekend, because "it wasn't scheduled" and people shouldn't have to work just because I feel the need to! And people wonder why I have a glass or 3 of wine!