The same things just keep happening over and over... it's madness.

I'm trying to emotionally separate myself from the drama with ss15 and his mother. I honestly feel I would be a much, much better source of support to DH if I were not so emotionally wrapped up in this. I get so upset when BM is harassing DH - that has decreased significantly, however. With much insistence on my part, DH very RARELY even responds to a text message from her much less talk to her. I have to admit things have been much more peaceful on that end.

What upsets me the most is the rudeness and disrespect that ss15 constantly displays. DH wants to call and talk with ss15 regularly. He wants to keep up with what's going on in his life, at school and maintain a bond with him. I understand and support this. But I get so upset when time after time ss15 will not answer DH's calls and will be short and rude with him most of the time when he does answer the phone.

Then I start to think about what it will be like when ss15 comes back to visit... He will show no respect to me or DH in our house and my tolerance for this is getting less and less. DH will have to clean up after him constantly. He will be rude most of the time, there is constant tension. Life is very unpleasant when he's around. I feel worn down and just emotionally drained after about 2 weeks of this. Just when DH finally starts to get through to him and they start to bond again, ss15 does start to exhibit signs of making an effort and showing more respect... and it's time for him to go home again.

Then as soon as ss15 goes home, there is more drama between BM and ss15, DH gets dragged into the middle of it... and once again ss15 refuses to speak to his father or show him any respect.

I feel very sad for my husband because he wants to spend time with his son and he wants to see his son grow into a respectable individual. I feel like when I get caught up in all this emotionally, it does DH or me no good, however. The more upset I get, the more difficult it becomes for me to handle and the less patience I have. I become irritable and angry with the constant drama, even when ss15 is not here. I dread ss15's visits more and more because so much hurt and anger is building up in me. My intentions are good, but they don't turn out well in the end because I get too emotional about everything.

I believe this whole situation would be just a little bit better for everyone if I could learn to deal with my emotions over all this.