SS’s Christmas tantrum

On December 21st, SS sends DH a text “are you getting me something for Christmas?!” “I want this” with a picture of some $80 paintball harness of sorts.

DH doesn’t reply because this year for Christmas, both SSs got ski season passes, ski rentals for the season, new helmets, new ski pants, new ski gloves, new ski goggles. I don’t even want to type how much that cost us, but it’s something for us all to do together, so away we go.

We also took both SSs to see a show (which they both loved) and to a fancy dinner over the weekend and spent over $150 so they would both have nice clothes to wear on Christmas, even though these clothes will be worn maybe once because we see them 4 times a month.

On Sunday (the 23rd) when SS is with us, he is alone with DH and again brings up the paintball harness. He screams at DH “why do you always get me what you want to get. You never get anything I want. Why can’t you just get one thing off my list?! Mom got me like 8 things off my list!” DH calmly says, “well, if you’d like something off your list, then we’ll just return all the ski stuff.” SS - “that’s not fair!!”

A couple other things to note: 1) we’ve told SS many times that we’re not interested in buying paintball gear. I’ve told them many times that it’s okay to have things they do with us and things they do with BM. Paintball is something they do with BM and skiing is something they do with us. 2) SS’s list was so terrible this year (I.e. it was short and full of overly expensive items) that MIL was texting me to ask what to get this SS for Christmas.

I’ll also add that in the time I’ve known him, this entitled brat has never once gotten anything - not even a card - for DH. He once gave DH $20 for Father’s Day and then demanded DH spend it on him saying, “I know you have money, Dad, because I just gave you some.”

I try to be sympathetic, but man, this SS pushes me to my limits sometimes.

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I can't even imaging

I can't even imaging witnessing that type of entitlement. I cried on my way home from work this morning (residential home for severely mentally ill and addicted). I cried because many of them have no families, no gifts, and one of them was crying this morning about it all. Tell that to your SS. If he's not moved/changed by it all, there's something definitely wrong with him.

...stuff like this breaks my

...stuff like this breaks my heart. I do not have a lot of family, but to have NOBODY must be so lonely.

Agreed

This SS in particular thinks his life is so difficult and he has no idea. BM is also entitled. Life is always “so unfair!” for her, too, even as a grown woman, so SS will always see his behavior and attitude as normal. I wish I could show him children who have so much less than he does, yet, still manage to be thankful and grateful.