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Being manipulative

MayCorine85's picture

Submitted by MayCorine85 on Thu, 01/28/2021 - 6:47pm

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General Discussion

So for the second day in a row SD has manipulated situations to make it seems like she is done wrong. 
So SD has been finishing school and jumping straight on the game, so instead I put the control up and said make sure HW and room is clean before playing. I then gave her a little multiplication or division problem to keep up her skills too. Mind you SD is 14 and these are 3rd grade problems. So two days I give it to her and on the 3rd day she lays in bed all day and then tells DH that she is depressed and sad because we are making her do 3rd grade work. Then says it brings back bad memories. Ugh.... You are headed to high school and can't do a simple 1 digit multiplication problem. So I said you know what I'm done, but DH comes home she is fine and does a problem for him with no problem. 
Today... For some reason whenever I leave the house SD thinks she should get fast food. Well today I said no, eat what in there. She says there is nothing in there... there was several things she could cook... but doesn't want to. She then calls her grandma and tells her we have no food in the house and she is hungry. I am so over this! And DH doesn't want to address it just play and laugh with her all day.... I need to disengage at another address 

 

 

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

Submitted by Wicked stepmo. on Thu, 01/28/2021 - 7:01pm

If she wants to be dramatic call her out on it. That's what I do with OSD it's great because she just avoids talking to me altogether. Apparently she does not appreciate my sarcasm.

I do it to YSD but she will actually knock it off because she realizes she is being a tool. One of her issues is she swears a lot and I can't stand that. So one day when we were at a family reunion she was doing it thinking she was showing off. I apologized to everyone for her behavior and told them she couldn't help it she had tourettes. She stormed off and hid in the cabin with embarrassment and didn't do it again. 

MayCorine85's picture

Submitted by MayCorine85 on Thu, 01/28/2021 - 7:16pm

Lol!!! That's is awesome! I want to call her out, but my issue is DH doesn't do anything to support that so I feel like why even bother doing it. 

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

Submitted by Wicked stepmo. on Fri, 01/29/2021 - 2:53am

It doesn't matter if my SO does anything or not. Iny situation I am happy SKs know I have Thier number and they don't like my response so they leave me alone and I don't have to deal with Thier behavior. 

They save Thier antics for SO which is fine by me.

MayCorine85's picture

Submitted by MayCorine85 on Fri, 01/29/2021 - 1:57pm

I asking myself this weekly! I'm done though.... I told DH last night that I'm not doing anything anymore, it's too much and I have my own small children to raise 

AgedOut's picture

Submitted by AgedOut on Fri, 01/29/2021 - 7:39am

"self, why am I the only person putting effort into a kid who does what she wants?" 

Then, tell your husband that since she refuses to do the work, refuses to do as expected for a mature teenager like she is, you are done. You will 1. remind her once. 2. stop at that point. He can deal with the fall out since he refuses to back you up. Step away from her schooling. Let the parent parent. 

And if she lies to grandma, call out those lies. "I have no idea why she lied to you and said we have no food. We have plenty." "I don't know why she called you and said x,y,z. She is lying and I'm not sure why she would do that" Every lie, point out the truth then step back and let her Dad do the dadding. Since she doesn't like to listen to you, don't give her the perks. "Can you bring me McDs?" "No I'm sorry, maybe you Dad will"