It might be a bit more understandable him saying he would "put his girls first" if these "girls" were 10 years younger than they are. However they are young women, not children - and he should be damn well putting YOU first, NOT them.  Even if they were 10 yrs younger, the relationship between you and him should still be the one to be considered first and foremost - the care of minor children flows from that.  You are most definitely on the right track.  Stay strong.  

Edited to add - there isn't really a protocol about naming blogs - whatever you feel comfortable with.  Most of us who follow a particular person's blogs would go back and refresh their memory as to their earlier blogs if necessary - this is easy enough to do if you go to the person's account page - their blogs and forum posts are all listed there. 

Well, how very big of him. He'll maybe take you into consideration once you bow before the first failed family altar. THE HELL YOU WILL! Who TF des he think he is? Has he lost touch with reality? At least now you know your place - you're a maid and a bed-warmer who pays her share of the bills. This guy isn't worth the pain. 

He's so clueless it hurts. He has kids who are adults and that he considers to still be children who need their daddy. They have both done serious stuff in the past and he doesn't understand that going off with one of them leaves him open to all kinds of accusations (get out before this happens and taints you too). He thinks that you, another adult and his supposed life partner, should be fine with accepting any crumbs he tosses your way and doesn't get why you refuse to be content with that. Rather than sort things out betwee the two of you and actually discuss the situation, he runs off to stay with a friend. He hasn't grown up yet. How much of this insulting and belittling treatment are you willing to put up with?

You mentioned in an earlier post that house prices are soaring where you live. I advised you to force the sale because the price of your house is also soaring and you might just recoup enough from the sale to pay off the rest of the mortgage. It's wotrh at least talking to a real estate agent to see what you could hope to sell your home for. Please consider informing yourself about this.

We are headed for another real estate crash; prices are starting to plummet.

 You don't want to be stuck with him in your house when the bottom falls out!!!

Say goodbye to this clueless fool.

Put your house on the market ASAP. Pack up his stuff. Either put it outside and text him to pick it up or put it in a storage facility (rented for one month). 

Title blogs whatever you want, I don't think it matters. Although if you put the topic of the post, it might gain more attention. 

He expected you to miss his wonderfulness and the scraps of attention he gave you & cave and beg him back. You didn't. You go girl. You deserve better then to be last in line. 

I am going preface everything that I am about to say with: The big picture here is about respect, and he has none for you. He isn't suddenly going to start and anything he does for you will be with animosity. 

However, I do he is point on one thing. If I want to take a trip for the weekend, with my money, with my kids and not anyone else- I will be damned if anyone is going to stop me. Now, I will coordinate the dates with my husband, I will ask and hope for his support in me going, but I will not be asking permission. 

DH has taken trips with just him and his kids- at my encouragement! They are usually my idea and I plan them for them. I think the bonding is important. I don't think they should stop just because someone is over 18. 

As an adult child- sometimes me and my mom go places, trips, whatever. No one thinks anything of it. Me and my dad will do things with no one else. No biggie! Sometimes no matter how old you are, hanging out one on one with your parents is just nice.

If him wanting time with his daughters was really the only issue here, I would say that you are wrong. However, that is far from the case, he is just using it as a sticking point to win the argument. 

You are here to be his wife, not a mother to his girls. He is here to be a husband to you, too. If not for that, why are you together? Did you sign up to be a volunteer unpaid nanny, cook, and maid? NOPE. You expected a relationship, as you rightly should. Why is he backing out of the deal? 

That is a deal breaker to me. I would let him know this up front, and ask him if he wants you to stay. If so, he needs to change.

As for SD-21 beating up SD-17, time for SD-17 to cave in SD-21's face and end the bullying.   Lifetime scars  tend to end a bullies crap.

A 21yo adult beating a 17yo should result in the 21yo in prison bearing lifetime scars.

IMHO.

I was the target of bullies when I was in my early to mid teens. It only ended when they hurt far worse than I did nad carried a lifetime reminder not to fuck with me.  Whether that reminder was in the mirror everytime they saw their face or when they dressed every AM with lifetime reminders on their lower torso and extemities.  They had reminders.

The beauty of defending one's self  from a bully is that the one initiating the assault has little recouse when they are beaten severly and experience lifetime physical consequences.

This lesson cannot come soon enough.  THe earliest possible lesson applied to a bully saves any number of people from the pain of the bully's crap.