I wish I had a time machine.

Because I'm tired of being a 'stepmother'.

I hate it, actually.

I hate the disrespect, the attitude.
I hate the apathy.

I hate the wasted time, emotions, sanity.

All the best years of my life are over and wasted on a brat that could care less if I was alive or dead.

Let me reiterate, *ahem* I DETEST BEING A STEPMOTHER.

Step child comes around and it makes me catch my breath.
Like a medium-sized black hole sucking the joy out of life.
A bottomless pit of anger and resentment.
My heart has become an abyss.

A word from the wise, if you're ever thinking of being a step-parent, DON'T

barkingdog828's blog
Log in or register to post comments

Comments

So, stop that.

Stop tolerating the crap, life isn't over until it is over, and the best part of it is today, and tomorrow. While the past may include some great stuff, it is the past.

Focus on living your best life and make sure that includes zero tolerance for all of the crap you listed above. Bring the pain down on the toxic when they pull their crap. Don't let them crush your bliss. Make part of your bliss crushing them with zero tolerance for their crap,

You want to see them lose their minds, parade your best life around proudly.

One key bonus on living well, is that it is the best revenge. Who cares if they care about you? The key is not to give a flying rat's shit about them.

Live well, enjoy your revenge.

Take care of you.

I have..

I've disengaged from every aspect of psycho step in all ways other than what is physically (and legally) required to keep them alive.

But their presence just makes my skin crawl.

True

I really like this response and I agree , however it's EASIER said than done when you don't have the support and when you feel like you're stuck. It makes it 10x harderzzz

I understand this - thanks

I understand this - thanks for the poem. Yes, a thankless role where you see the worst behaviors and recieve the most awful treatment. I used to "joke" that everyone in the stepfamily system treating stepmom horribly, indifferently and/or not stepping in would be stuck on a purgatory elevator that would sometimes go down to the depths of h*** and heat up the bottom of the elevator so they could feel the burn that we have felt over and over again. Then someone much wiser could decide whether the doors open to heaven or to ....

Is it possible to get out of

Is it possible to get out of the situation?

Nope.

I love my husband.
I love our life.

But I cannot stomach another second of my life with psycho stepchild in it.

Think the majority of us

Feel that way. We see the results. We see our efforts went to waste. If we did nothing the results. Would be the same. Except we would be better off.

Very well said

I'm not glad that you've been where I am, because it's a dark place.
But I am glad that I'm not alone.

I know the feeling.

IMO step parenting (from a woman perspective) is NOT worth it unless your partner/spouse earns multiple six figures AND takes you off your job to deal with their domestic t3rror!st kids/conniving meddling ex wife/and money going into another woman's home

Now that I know that majority of these single dads are with the Disneyland antics ..... If I ever gotta deal with a man with dependents again .... best believe I'm getting ALL my needs met

Dont let these men take you through it (use you as a doormat, free nanny, child support subsidizer, free chauffeur, free bang maid) .... at least get compensated so if you have to walk away you have something to show for all the years invested in their side show train wreck parenting dysfunction

I’m there

I am a SAHM. All my needs are met plus more.
But I also have to have psychopath 3 days a week on my own.
shoot me.

^spread some pamphlets out in

^spread some pamphlets out in the kitchen table with the top 3+ day/week boarding schools

.... off to boarding school you go little Timmy!

When YSD was a teen

We literally shipped her off to (a very nice) boarding school. Money well spent. Too bad she couldn't stay there forever.

I'm a huge proponent of

I'm a huge proponent of boarding school. My dad went, I went, my brother went, we sent my SKid.

Though for us it was nto a get rid of the kid thing. Dad, me, and my brother were all raised as 3CKs and had to attend boarding school for HS. SS went because his mom and I were at the end of our ropes with his failure to engage in life. So, we sent him somewhere that offered him no other option. Money well spent. Though SpermClan interferance did detract from the experience. It matured SS immensly and set him up for success in his adult life.

Though for us it was nto a

Though for us it was nto a get rid of the kid thing

definitely understand there are a variety of types of boarding schools.

Most commonly known boarding schools accommodate kids whose parents may not have the resources (time, high levels of structure, support from qualified professionals, etc) to improve their behavior at home

However there are also typical boarding schools that are no different than college but for younger kids in their teens. Some notable celebrities have come from boarding schools and quality boarding schools are producing very qualified college students

Why is the kid there if your

Why is the kid there if your husband isn't? The point of visitation is for the kid to spend time with the bio parent, NOT to give BM a break by using you as her unpaid babysitter. Can't they organise their visitation better so he manages to spend more time with his child?

Because that would make sense

BM doesn't want to change the schedule because she 'works' I guess.

I think it's stupid.

Y'know, if she's the

Y'know, if she's the custodial parent, you don't have to take the kid and it's her problem to figure out childcare ...

Completely Agree

The statement that says, "get compensated so if you have to walk away you have something to show for all the years invested" is gold. Your husband should be taking care of all your needs, ESPECIALLY if you are involved in his kids lives. We get what we think we deserve, and you deserve to be taken care of in the ways that you need. If your husband refuses to do so, you can kindly remind him that another man will, and there is a great chance that this other man won't come with the baggage of a lifetime dealing with disneyland antics and ungrateful, soul-sucking skids.

If your husband refuses to

If your husband refuses to do so, you can kindly remind him that another man will, and there is a great chance that this other man won't come with the baggage of a lifetime dealing with disneyland antics and ungrateful, soul-sucking skids.

100%

Knowing that another more well-adjusted man with less baggage (and more money bc they don't have child support obligations; and less emotional strain bc no baby mama drama and no domestic t3rrorists) will trigger their memory and the reality that if they don't pull themselves together to be better partners then there are plenty of men with greener grass that will replace them.

I'm "celebrating"

15 yrs of peace and quiet since the last of Chef's ferals PASed out. Definitely a waste of time money and effort poured down the BM black hole vortex.

I think that is why Chef is so driven nowadays because we don't pay CS anymore after 20 long years. That should read I don't pay any more CS on Chef's behalf for 20 long years. It seems he is making up for8 lost time by working almost constantly.

What is PAS ?

My spouse works out of town a majority of the time. :/

I've tried being "strong" and resilient for so long.... but I'm just tired of the facade.

Parental Alienation Syndrome

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parental_alienation_syndrome

I LOVE

How the "experts" dismiss Parental Alienation as a figment of the imagination akin to the Tooth Fairy when we all know it is all too REAL. I'm thinking some of these "experts" practice PAS in their own lives aka the sainted BM wears a halo and could NEVER program their child(ren) against the father and his relatives. /s We all know hell hath no fury as a scorned woman (where dad got fed up and decided for whatever reason to move on.) Of course guilty/disney "parenting" only throws fuel onto the fire of Parental Alienation.

Right? The "experts" can suck

Right? The "experts" can suck rocks that have been in the bottom of a fish tank for the past 50 years.

Who is the lady who wrote about it from experience? Cheryl something???

ETA: Mefferd! https://parentalalienationspeaks.com/author/parentalalienationspeaks/pag...