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DW taking the bullet for SS's poor shower habits.

Drac0's picture

Why do they do this?

This morning SS took his usual bi-weekly shower. Except this kid never draws the shower curtains properly and he never learned to dry himself at least a little bit before actually stepping out of the shower. So the bathroom after SS took a shower looks like either we have a plumbing leak or a soaked Great Dane waltzed in and shook himself dry.

I walked into the kitchen where both DW and SS were eating breakfast. I told SS that after he finished eating, the bathroom needs to be mopped. DW looks up and asks why. I showed her and DW immediately starts laying her used towel down and cleaning up.

“Why are you doing this?” I asked. “SS is the one who made this mess.”

“Oh it *might* have been me.” DW answers. “I took a shower in here right before SS did.”

Really DW!?!?

Funny how all weekend that SS wasn't with us and DW took showers AND bathed BS and BD in the same bathtub the bathroom floor and walls were dry as a bone. But the morning that SS decides his week-long grime is too much to handle and takes a shower, the bathroom is soaked!

Do your spouses do this too? Cover up messes that the skid made and say it *might* be their fault?

Like what is so bloody wrong with telling the skid “Hey! YOU made this mess. YOU clean it up!”?

Comments

QueenBeau's picture

"Do your spouses do this too? Cover up messes that the skid made and say it *might* be their fault?"

no. That's just weird

"Like what is so bloody wrong with telling the skid “Hey! YOU made this mess. YOU clean it up!”?"

Absolutely nothing is wrong with it if you are a normal parent. Your DW has issues with parenting your ss at all times though right? So I'm not surprised.

Jsmom's picture

I do it sometimes just to keep the peace. But, will go back later and point it out to BS19 out of DH's earshot.

Lili B's picture

I wonder why you do that? It undermines your DH's reasonable/legitimate concern to lie to DH only to secretly address your BS behind DH's back doesn't it? I ask this kindly because I know how it feels to point out a reasonable issue that could be easily fixed only to have BP jump to skid's defense and exclude me from what could be a learning point with skid and to set the example that DH & I are a team.

Bio-Step-Mom's picture

No...he doesn't. But when he blames my bios for something I did and I tell him it was me, he THINKS I'm covering for them.

thinkthrice's picture

Hmmm this ties in with HadEnoughx5's blog. In my case, Prince Hygiene, at the time stb 7, would leave wet towels all over the bedroom floor.

When I pointed this out to Chef with EXTREME tact, of course (after Prince had left) Chef got angry and said "If you don't like it, then YOU should pick it up." (umm I'm disengaging from your hapless children and NOT playing scullery maid)

Then I said: "Well the wet towels will ruin the new laminate floor"

Yet again another lame excuse--now yelling: "I can fix ANYTHING in this house--I MADE this house what it is!"

Then I tried to reason (big mistake) stating something like an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

Sheer rage back.

Whereas a NORMAL parent would say: "yes, you're right; I should teach Prince Hygiene to pick up after himself."

Of course, to this day, Chef has a revisionistic view of what really happened as he deludes himself into thinking that he "kicked his kid's butts and that's why they don't come over any more." (TM)

Totally discounting his wimpy guilty daddy routine (that NEVER happened according to HIM) and the massive PAS BEER BONGED by the skids courtesy of the BM and clan.

Funny thing though. . .when Chef is in one of his alcoholic rages over some perceived "slight" that I "disrespected him for" such as saying "Gee, the NFL Sunday Footbal Ticket has been added automatically to the Direct TV account and I don't think that's right"*** It's ME whose at fault for his PASed out kids.

***Alcoholic Narcissist Subtitle: "You should never complain about the price of NFL Sunday Ticket, even in the most INDIRECT manner, because, by GOD, Chef's mere PRESENCE in my house is FOUR TIMES worth his weight in gold."

the good the bad the ugly...mom's picture

Actually, I do...but for a different reason.

I completely do it to piss my SO off. Not so much anymore, at least not lately cuz he's learning slowly.
My situation is probably a little different though. My SO is always picking on everyone for EVERYTHING. Sometimes its a totally valid complaint but most times he's just nitpicking. Oh and sorry, that is everyone EXCEPT for his Precious Little Princess Boy.

Princess Boy, in SO's eyes, is perfect, can never do no wrong, and if he did do something "questionable", excuses galore, like oh he's just a little kid, he didn't know, or he didn't mean it. We're talking excuses for dropping food all over the place instead of his mouth, whining, crying, hitting, screaming at another kids, tattling about other kids whining, crying, hitting, screaming, or tattling on him...UGH!!! SO makes excuses and constantly spoils and babies the brat.

So when my bio's "supposedly" does something wrong, I just say "oh it's ok I'll clean it or I'll do it. Hey, if you can spoil your kid, I can spoil mine". Usually I will go back quietly and makes my kids do it though, they still gotta learn.

Princess Boy is annoying as hell but unfortunately I care about the dumb turd, its HIS FATHER/MY SO that is driving me nutso. Which has resulted in me being sometimes completely irrational. Its starting to work a little.

HadEnoughx5's picture

This is my huge pet peeve with DH. They make a mess, he cleans it up. They leave stuff in the car, he brings it up. They leave their laundry in a basket, he'll fold and hang them. He will make their beds with them etc. These skids will never know what to do on their own. SS's are 13 and 14.5 :?

thinkthrice's picture

I remember telling Chef that his kids were old enough to: (10, 8 and 4)

-Bring in their OWN bags/luggage for weekend visits (he would act like a Coleman Porter! :barf:)
-Cut their own food with utensils (Seriously Chef?)
-Bathe themselves and do general hygiene such as wipe, flush and wash (and nope Chef didn't enforce this)
-Entertain themselves (good luck on this one)
-Pick up after themselver (again, good luck on this one)

Lili B's picture

Ditto! It's frustrating bc not only is he failing to hold his kids accountable for silly little, fixable, things that give them bad habits for "launching," but DH is showing the kids I can be ignored.  (And trust me I've disengaged so I don't "parent," but I may occasionally mention to the kids they left garbage in my car or ask them to bring me towels.... so DH jumps into action.)

luchay's picture

Do your spouses do this too? Cover up messes that the skid made and say it *might* be their fault.

OMG yes. It drives me insane.

No matter what the transgression OH will ALWAYS find a way to make it his fault not theirs. SD14 left a huge pile of food rubbish all over her room again (the rule is NO food upstairs - mainly because SD is an obese little piggywig, who will sit in her room alone and eat herself sick) And OH will say "Oh that's my fault, I forgot to get her a bag to put the rubbish in!"

OMFG are you serious????

I have opted out of her pigging out and gorging problems, now my ONLY issue is that she is leaving her room a pigsty with food rubbish, crumbs, half full juice boxes under the bed etc - attracting ants, cockroaches, mice etc. and I will NOT have that in my house. So I opt in to tell her to deal with the mess, but that eating herself into an early grave is her parents problem - and if they don't care to deal with it I can't.