DH has a bad habbit of guilty parenting. I understand it, I had the urge to do so when I got divorced, but I wouldn't let myself. I've had numerous conversations with him about it, why it's not a good thing to do, the outcome if he keeps doing it, and this last weekend it hit home.
At YBS soccer tournament, I and a few other parents got very snippy with DH because darling Princess Pisspants wouldn't leave anyone alone. Since it was made clear that the crowd of people were there to watch the soccer game that she was not involved with she just had to make it all about her. Dancing all over the side of the field, singing obnoxiously loud and going up to all these strangers and telling them about her new kitty.
I told DH more than once to get her under control, but he didn't see anything wrong with darling Princess Pisspants behavior, "She's just being a kid"
No DH, she's being an attention whore and it's starting to piss everyone off, not just me. No one here cares about her cat and no one here besides you wants to hear her sing or see her dance. If you want to have a preformance by dPPP then take her somewhere else and give her all your attention.
He finally made her sit down and be quiet which pissed her off to no end.
After it was over I just wanted to go home. I didn't want to stop any where or go through a drive through or go out to eat. I wasn't alone in my opinion either, not only did my bios want to go home, his three BS's wanted to as well. So, dPPP got outvoted and we went home. The pout on her face was stuck there for pretty much the rest of the day.
While I was cooking dinner, DH was sitting at the table with SS9. SS9 like to build things from practically nothing. I will had it to the kid, he's a talented little thing. And DH was giving him all his attention.
dPPP-I want to paint my nails
DH-not now Princess
dPPP- Yes daddy, now
DH - No. Dinner will be ready soon, maybe after dinner.
dPPP- I want a happy meal.
DH - No, we're not going out to eat. SM is cooking.
dPPP- I said I want a happy....
DH - (interrupted her) I said no, now go sit down and be quiet.
Dinner was cooked, plates were served and I went to round up children to eat. That's when I saw sPPP sitting behind the couch, nail polish all over her hands, face, in her hair, and all over the carpet and back of the couch.
Lord baby Jesus please come down and restrain me, this child needs your protection now.
I called DH over, showed him darling Princess and the mess she made with...oh fuck no...that's my nail polish she basically dumped all over the floor. Lord baby Jesus, please teach me forgivness right now, needs that lesson right now!!
DH got mad, I was shocked. And appearently so was dPPP, she started crying...again...no tears. And then screaming. He told her she was grounded, no tv, no games, no toys, no playing outside, just sitting at the table the rest of the night. Oh the screams got louder. Then she threw the bottle of nail polish at either me or DH but it hit DH in the face. She got up and slowly started walking to her room.
dPPP you come back here now, you are going to clean this mess up by your self, I'm not going to do it and neither is SM.
dPPP, still "crying" just keeps walking and says no I'm not.
Now, here comes the voice that I like to call the dppp voice.
Sweety, please come here, daddy's not mad at you.....
Lord baby Jesus please forgive me...
I cut him off right there. WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE NOT MAD??? Man the fuck up already. I get it she's your only girl, she's the youngest, that doens't give her the right to make everyone here miseralbe and destroy shit because you dared to show your son some attention. You're not mad huh??? Well guess what dPPP SM is pissed the hell off right now. Shut your damn crying, get an old towel and the nail polish remover and clean this up now. After that, you can eat and get your ass into bed with no TV tonight and I don't want to hear crap about how you're scared to sleep with the tv off. What you need to be scared of is me if you don't get this nail polish off my the carpet and the couch. Now, get your finger out of your mouth and march right now.
I guess no one was expecting that, they were all looking at me wide eyed. My oldest, his oldest and his youngest sons were all smirking and SS9 said all.
"Wow, it's about time she gets in trouble for her crap too"
Ok, all of you, sit down and eat dinner. Tonight is going to be an early night for us all and I don't want to hear anything about it.
Long story short, well, a little shorter, she did not get the nail polish out of the carpet or off of the couch. She almost seemed happy about that. She actually giggled a little bit when she told her dad that. So, the voice in my head that usually tells me, you probably shouldn't do that was very silent at that moment. I grabbed her most favorite toy. I showed it to her, asked her to look out the window to the back porch. She was watching, I took her toy and beat it to all hell with a hammer. Destroyed it, while she looked on. If felt good.
When I came back inside DH asked me don't you think you went a bit to far? Now she really was crying.
No, I don't think I did. Because from now on, if she destroys anything else of mine, the kids, or parts of the house, I'm going to take something of hers and destroy it too. I think it's only fair. You won't do anything about her constant temper tantrums, her obnoxious behavior, or the attention whore tendencies. I'm going to bed now. Goodnight.
Maybe I did go overboard. I don't know, but the next day when the boys asked me about it, I giggled when I said
"yep I sure did" she again...had her pout face.