How To Say No. Open your mouth and say NO if you do not want to play nanny, maid, chef, ATM.....And when you day no, mean it.

Speak UP~if someone says/does something to upset or hurt you,speak up. There's no need to sick and wait for your SO/husband to stand up for you.

Brushing Your Teeth 101

How to Make a Bed 102

How to Eat Like a Human 200

How to Do Things Consistently - For Spouses 300

How to Do Things Consistently - For Kids 201

How to Follow a Rule 103

That Handle Makes the Poop Go Down 205

Why You Stink 202

Manners for Kids 106

Manners for Spouses 301

How to Clean Up Things That Come Out of You 211

Act Your Age 115

Boundaries for Spouses 333

Speak Up Now: Advanced techniques in the art of nurturing your voice and your relationship at the same time. At the end of the course students will have demonstrated the ability to avoid the onset of sudden mutism due to shock; to habitually remind herself she matters, too; practice the art of love that cannot survive her feedback on child behavior will not survive a marriage anyway; bring up a delicate child related topic in a manner that reminds the spouse they are still on the same team; to remain polite and courteous and insist her partner not only do the same but he expect it of his children; keep the romance alive without dying inside.

A Masters degree and a Ph.D. in this topic is also on offer although the faculty is still assembling their own credentials.

BM/SM Duality: how to wear Two Hats while embracing Your Inner Hypocrite.
My mascot for this class will be the double headed eagle.

And for the spring semester, a perennial favorite,
The Evil Mother, aka Stepmother, in Literature, Myth and Film.
Cinderellas of all ages, this one is for you!

KoolAid Withdrawal: Theory and Practice (geared towards codependent men)
How to put the bottle down, how to live with anxiety, how to grow a spine
in three comprehensive sections.

"How to avoid catching a felony assault charge while dealing with MOTY" (aka almost everything is more important than my children unless someone is watching)

Ooh:

Balls: What They Are and How To Use Them

(No, this is not a gym class.)

Beginning Manipulation - When to recognize the game.
Intermediate Manipulation - When and how to respond to the game.
Advanced Manipulation - BM (and/or skids), get a job already, cause I'm not playing this game.

Bitch Please 101 and Ain't Nobody Got Time for That! 102 - taught by me (and Sweet Brown)

Comeback Creation - Witty replies for every skid comment when all you want to say, "Oh really? Well your mom's a phucking whore!"

Intro to Cages: Building New Homes for BM and Skids

How to be a Man (a refresher course for men with daughters)

Skid Recipes (101 ways to make skids edible while virtually eliminating their foul odor)

Bandaging Your Tongue - How to heal those pesky bites after a skid weekend

Decoding the Blank Stare

How your balls got in BM'S purse 101
How to get your balls out of BMs purse 102
And for the advanced class:
How to KEEP your balls out of BM'S purse forever! 901

Replying to electronic communication from BM with zero emotion 101
Predicting the unpredictable nature of BM 305
MOTY tendencies as correlated to lunar cycles and new boyfriends/wallets 506

Must add:
- Coping mechanisms for the surprise of "unknown" arrearage child support 101
- That pesky false CPS investigation (graduate level) 501, and my ultimate favorite:
- How to use stress hives for the greater good 101

How to siphon off money from your shared account for that escape plan

Recognising dysfunctional families and how to avoid them

How to differentiate between a firm penis and a firm parent.

How to have your cake and eat it too ... while keeping separate residences.

How to undermine teenaged girls and make them look absolutely stupid.
Part 2 is making said teen girls live in fear of you.

I will teach: How To Do Chores
Although I am pretty sure this concept is SO foreign no one will get it. So I must teach foreign language first. Wow..harder on me than them. Why am I not surprised!?!?!?!

For step parents: These Are Not My Children: This course will equip you with phrases and actions to make clear to innocent bystanders and meddling in laws that you are in no way, shape, or form responsible for any embarrassing actions committed by skids.

For bios: Table Manners: How to model, teach, and enforce table manners for your children. This course will answer age old questions such as "Why don't the Smiths invite us over any more?" and "Why is everyone in the restaurant staring at us?"

For steps who have heard that last question, we highly recommend the These Are Not My Children course.

How to talk about skids with SO and not upset SO - but make him do what you want in the
End - upper level 302

How to cook for skids, or not, but still get dinner for yourself - intro 110

Ignoring all activity around you - 101

French wine vs. Beer - making choices at the store depending on what weekend is nearest - 103

Someone should teach Defecation and Period Etiquette for Step Children

This thread made my day!

Loving a BM's child like your own: Distinguishing Myth from Fact 101 (target audience Biodads)
Encouraging Thoughfulness in Children 201 (child development is a prereq)
Truth, Dare, and Consequences in Stepfamilies 101

If It's On The Floor When You Leave, It's Garbage.

Learn the subtle, but progressive tactics of engaging your DH/DW/SO in your war against skids leaving things all over the floor of the house before they head back home. From candy wrappers to dirty socks to new t-shirts to video games....GONE!

One class is dedicated to tactics to use if your DH/DW/SO backtracks or flounders and how to get them back on track.

Keeping Your Floors Skid-Clutter Free and WINNING!!!

Aw shoot. For me it's a no-brainer:

"Stupid Man Tricks 101: How to survive in the Dog House"

"High Altitude! Setting yourself up for life just by being Tall."

"All Nutella, All the time: How to make the most out of your Grocery budget and the fine art of hiding food"

"Geekdom: How to amuse yourself for hours when the skid hogs your spouse's attention 24/7"

The Non-Reply 201: Bland responses for the Disengaged Stepmom

"Whatever you think is best" "Oh really?" "That's nice" "That's too bad." "What are you planning on doing?"

Read Between the Lines aka Southern Charm: Express your Feelings while Maintaining Class

"Bless Your Heart" "Isn't that precious?"

Stepmommery--The Fastest Way To Self Flagellation

If You Weren't a Masochist, you WILL Be

Plastic Furniture Covers--And Why They're Not Just For The Under 3 Set

Why We Can't Have Nice Things 101

Entitlement 101

Help fathers (or mothers) understand they're disabling their child with the numerous handouts.
Parents will learn that they're NOT helping their adult child to become independant by their "giving" ways.
Field work will show ways to quickly wean skads off the perceived entitlements.

I'm behind a day but had to say this has made my day worthwhile!

I would like to teach Manipulation 101: how to recognize you have been manipulated for years. And Manipulation 201: how to pretend you are not being manipulated until you finish the course on getting your balls back.