Some back ground.My parents have been married 25 years. Many of you know that I was adopted by my stepdad. Many of you don’t know that I have an older step sister. She was kept away from my father for a number of years. Her mother put in her in state care because she couldn’t control her around 13 years old. Somehow this was Dad’s fault even though his ex did everything she could to keep his daughter away from him. Dad’s ex made the usually pas comments, she accused my dad of abuse ect (their relationship failed because she cheated on my father).

When my mother and the rest of us came into the picture, suddenly it was ok for Dad to be around his daughter. His ex encouraged the contact and started working her way back in with dad’s family. My grandmother told my mother shortly after she and dad got engaged that she would always be his ex’s friend first. I guess Dad’s ex made a couple passes at him shortly before he married my mom (shocker, I know).

When dad started the process of adoption, his daughter accused him of sexual abuse. Dad was investigated, cleared and the adoption went through. She swore she would see him in jail. She would go back and forth from loving him to hating him. My mother put her foot down after she accused him of sexual abuse and she was no longer welcome in the family home (she was about 16 at this point).

She got pregnant at 17 and began talking to Dad again on a regular basis. Shortly thereafter they had yet another fall out. Dad had begun distancing himself, I mean you can only take so much of the back and forth, the false accusations and the pressure from the ex. It was true crazy making. It hurt him but he stepped away.

A couple of years later, Dad gets a call from my step sister’s neighbor. She had been arrested two days before but didn’t tell the police about her three year old daughter at home. Dad and Mom went and picked her up. Baby is still in diapers, doesn’t talk at all, raids the fridge at night time-clear neglect. Step sister claims she’s going to have them arrested for kidnapping and files a restraining order from jail. Mom and Dad give baby to CPS. They attempted to adopther but my step sister blocked it.

My step sister has been in and out of jail, has multiple children with multiple men. Somehow this is all dad’s fault. Her mother loves her and protects her… Does any of this sound familiar?

Anywho, I guess my Dad’s ex sent him an email recently. He didn’t get it at first because it landed in his spam folder but he was talking about it and it was shared with me.

The typos are hers:
Last Words. First let me say that I am at the end of my life, I am dying, cancer. But I have some final words for you that I feel I deserve your reading. I’ve spent my life loving no ne but yo, taking care of your child and grandchildren, or demon child as you so correctly put it all those years ago. But I took care of her and her children because they were all I had left of you. I never wanted that divorce, I never stopped loving you all these years and I’ve found strength all this time by telling myself that someday you and I would see each other again. That will not be the case. I’m told by many that I should hate you for leaving me to deal with all your daughter has put me thru alone but I cannot. She is now headed for prison for the third time. I have found hr children a decent home with much difficulty and I do not hate you. I still and in the herafter will love you as much as I did the day we got married and I am so sorry my pride stood in the way of our reconciliation way back when but I just felt so guilty at that time for having cheated on your and knew you deserved better than that, I’ve hated myself ever since, not you. Take care, enjoy your life and what you have made of it and don’t feel guilty about being what your daughter calls a deadbeat dad and grandparent , which I do not agree with.
We once promised each other for 13 yrs that we would always be friends. I’m happy ur life worked out.

Signed EX

Thirty years later and still trying to guilt trip him.