VENT: BM basically abandons 3SS and is trying to get pregnant off state medical.
:jawdrop:
So my FDH's ex aka as Cow, never sees these kids. I raise them and I do a better job drunk in a day than she ever did in 10 years.
I'm so frustrated- she is supposed to have half phys and half legal custody but has seen them for a TOTAL of 4 nights in the last 2 years!!!! My FDH doesnt want to take her to court because she's actually out of our hair and not messing with the kids daily-honestly, we dont need the money that bad BECAUSE WE BOTH WORK and they are more emotionally stable when they dont see her.
She does crazy crap to them..Mostly, She will promise the kids she's gonna take them and not show up. Like 20 min before her WEEKEND suddenly her BF has a hangnail. Talk about disappointment for them and US(would be nice to have some time off too!)
This stupid cow lives 25 min from here and is too busy sucking off of the state welfare system to work. Her current supposed fiance aka Johnboy is the biggest wacko ever. This guys a total lying freak and they make a perfect couple. He's so crazy that he suddenly has a NEW "lifelong" profession and accent whenever we see him...
AND He checks me out(not being cocky but I'm ten times hotter and more than a hundred pounds lighter) and gives me "the look" everytime they have come around!!!! GROSS! WHAT A SCUMBAG!!!
BUT Screw it, now I flirt with him back just to piss her off-hey it's all I can do without messing up the kids and my hubby to be is right there and he thinks its just as hilarious). This is me: "Heyyyy JOhnboy. How's your hangnail?(insert hair twirling and wink right about now). }:)
ANYWAY...........................
SO a few weeks ago, I'm hanging out with my BFF and she's trying to get pregnant...we are on Baby center and READY? WE come across Cow and Johnboys picture! :jawdrop:
COW AND JOHNBOY are going thru every fertility treatment ever created for the LAST TWO YEARS! ANDDDDDDD
THEY ARE USING THE STATE WELFARE INSURANCE TO DO IT!!!!!!!!!
WELL NO WONDER YOU DONT HAVE TIME TO BE A MOMMY!! YOU'RE TOO BUSY ON YOUR BACK!!!!!!!!!! :sick:
FANCY THAT! THE COW WHO DOES NOT TAKE CARE OF HER KIDS NOW-no child support______ NOTHING!_____ NO XMAS presents! NO BDAY Presents!....aww, so sweet, WANTS a "Blessing of THEIR own".
I thought I was gonna go threw the damn ceiling! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? JOhnboy doesn't see his own daughter! You don't see your THREE kids! YOU WANT TO MAKE MOREEEEEEEEEEE BABIES? WHY! These are children! Not houseplants!
WHO gets to raise this baby when you are bored with it? ME?!?!?!? You're so called kids??!!!
---I'm so angry! I want to mess with her so bad!
I'm honestly afraid she's gonna get knocked up but I have a feeling that her crazy bf has been fixed but wont tell her. according to her babymaking blog he keeps dodging the sperm test. he also seems to be becoming disinterested in her...(250lbs of sitting at home is pretty sexy...)
shes gonna get knocked up by whoever shes with next. she will do anybody too. she cheated on my FDH (who's gorgeous and I don't even know how she ever got with him in the first place)and sleeps with married guys, guys she met online, anyone-she's gross.
I want her to just stay away. FOREVER. And not reproduce. I dont want us to get stuck "babysitting" the new sibling and the kids would get suckered. And I don't want to watch her "old" kids to be even MORE traumatized than they already are... plus I know I AM BEING SELFISH here BUT I am too busy raising her OLD family to raise her NEW one!
wait--why would you have to
wait--why would you have to raise her new one? Its her and some other guys kid right? SO where would you and your DH come into play? Its not your new sk or his bio kid??
either way thats way messed
either way thats way messed up...you should tell the doctor and go to friend of the court with that...theres gotta be something they can do to stop her from breeding more. In fact I'm almost sure of it. I knew a girl that lost custody of her 2 other children and then promptly got knocked up by yet another guy and the state took her new baby and put her in foster...
Our family is one of the
Our family is one of the nicest out there. I am worried that my stepkids who are 14,13, and 10 (aka perfect babysitting age) would end up watching the new kid all the time. They are kids who would help anyone out-especially mommy. Either way, I am just extremely frustrated at the potential hurt she is obviously trying to project onto these kids. How are they going to feel towards that new half sibling? About themselves? "We aren't lovable but new baby is"...what kind of future relationship damage is that going to do to them?
I am just consistently appalled at how SELFISH and UNmaternal this Cow is. I want to tell her parents or someone. I'm just angry at her for hurting the kids. Sucks when youre the stepmom and you love the kids more than the Bio does.
Also, I just DO NOT understand how you could LEAVE your kids so easily to be raised by another woman!? How could you just come and go? They try to see her and she blows them off. I just dont get it.
@squeakers: I care about my
@squeakers: I care about my SS more than his mom as well.
The kids will each handle it in their own individual way. You have it pretty nailed down with what you listed above. They say kids with abusive and/or absent parents continually long for them. Eventually, when they get older, they will realize and acknowledge that YOU always were their true Mother:)
Until you get to that warm, fuzzy of a feeling day in the future, YOU dictate if the kids are even allowed to babysit the new kid or visit the mom. Hell, I would cut that woman off due to the emotional damage she is doing. If you don't already, have Husband get Sole Physical + Legal Custody (two different things).
I'm from the school of thought which feels that just because someone gives birth to a child doesn't mean the child must see, or have a relationship with that person. I'm so sick of hearing people say "Well, that's their mother"
You must get Husband to be on the same page as you. Unite on a front. Those are your kids. Tell him that.
I'm so with you. I don't get
I'm so with you. I don't get it either. I raised my 2 bioD by my self. Theres no way in hell. I would have gave my kids to someone else to raise. If I would have had to share they I would probably be the BM that is a control freak. My girls dad went MIA so I never had to deal with him. I have 2 wonderful well adjust girls. Our BM thinks we're suppose to forgive her for everything she does. Nothing is ever her fault. My poor ss loves her to death and is happy to see her when he gets to. I have strong feeling about this right now so I'm going to shut up. But I totally agree.
I would get the kids some
I would get the kids some counseling to see how they feel about everything...and you said she doesnt see them that much? petition the courts for PC.
Thanks for all the support
Thanks for all the support ladies! I just joined this site and I get more solace here than from wine or any therapist. THANKS! MUAH!!!!
The cow decided to announce on FB how much she missed the kids(BS but gotta keep up that internet persona!) so of course the kids are all excited because its technically her weekend(and they know that)...so after shes all mommy of the year on Facebook, who texts her kids that this weekend isnt good for her...
So guess who drops what they are doing to console angry hurt kids? Me. Who takes them out to eat when I had tons of work to do? Me. Who wants to tell that cow where to go so bad I would pay money to my enemies to do it? Me.
I have bowel movements that care about these kids more than she does.
I HATE HER
What an awful woman! I'd
What an awful woman! I'd defintely petition the courts and try to get her blocked out of their lives completely. I understand that they love her, but she's doing longterm damage to them. I hope she just fades herself out and soon. I feel so awful for YOUR kids.
This is too long for her to