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SS is driving me nuts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sam's picture

Submitted by sam on Mon, 02/09/2009 - 7:51am

So last night dh and i sat down and talked to eachother after 2 days of ignoring eachother.I wrote a list of things that need to be fixed only 4 things on my list that i believe is a functional family.1.Dh needs to communicate and drop this passive aggressive crap.He said he will try and make an effort but to be patient with him.2.We must try to build up our relationship because it is slowly deteriorating.3.he must be a united front when it comes to the kids.He said that ss has never done anything so instead of pissing him off we should take steps with him.Do you guys agree with that?4.He must stick up for me if i am being bashed by anyone{bm,sd or ss]He said that he will try but it is hard for him because he does not like conflict that is very true but i dont know what to think about that one.So i tell him last night to give ss a alarm clock to wake himself up in the morning because i have been doing that for 2 years now.SS never set his alarm this morning so i had to wake him up so he didnt miss the bus for school.Dh didnt see him this morning so should i tell dh to tell ss to set alarm for tomorrow and what happens if he doesnt?

Comments

sam's picture

Submitted by sam on Mon, 02/09/2009 - 9:11am

dh this morning at 7;20 that ss did not set his alarm and he is going to miss the bus i asked him what to do and his response is i dont know!!!

Austen's picture

Submitted by Austen on Mon, 02/09/2009 - 9:17am

Apparently, you're easier to deal with when you're angry than the others, if he doesn't view your getting "bashed" as conflict. It should be understood that any criticism of you from the kids or the BM simply is not tolerated!
I don't understand, though, what the problem is with waking up SS? I wake mine up each morning, but he's in middle school and is no problem to rouse.
Is your SS in high school, or particularly hard to wake up?
If he's in high school, it's your job to make sure he can survive in the wild once he gets older -- so he can set his own alarm clock and deal with the consequences.
P.S. I recently saw an alarm clock that's like a plane -- it flies all over the room so you really can't press the snooze button and go back to sleep. Perhaps that would be helpful for him if he's just a deep sleeper? They're maybe $20.

sam's picture

Submitted by sam on Mon, 02/09/2009 - 9:24am

is 16 years old almost 17 and does nothing and i mean nothing in the house so why is it a big deal if i ask him to use an alarm clock.I get up and make his lunch and deal with 2 dogs who are up my ass the minuete i set my feet on the ground.So i really dont think it is a big deal and a very simple thing my bs is in jr high and uses an alarm clock.And about dh having conflict i have tried to talk to him but he is still all nicey nicey.Its like he is scared to piss his kids off.