You are here

Facebook hurts my feelings

Needalifeboat's picture

And it really pisses me off that I let it. I'm embarrassed for myself. I was looking over SO's FB last night, just to see if my crazy thoughts were correct. And they are. If I untagged SO from all my pics, and then you looked at his page, it would be like my kids and I barely exist. No mention of my kids or events we're at with him. Only events with his kids. Selfies with his kids, locations they've been to.

He has me in his profile pic and the relationship status with me but that's pretty much it. Barely a pic of the two of us that he has uploaded. It's all my pics that I've tagged him in.

He says he wants one big family, but that's a joke. Social media sucks.

Needalifeboat's picture

And also, there are multiple pics of skids on my page. I've tagged them too when we've been at a party or gone somewhere together.

byebyebirdie's picture

i hate FB too i got rid of mine in the spring and i do not miss it and i love the fact i do not have to comment on stuff SD does! also the less i know about what goes on in people life the better i am.

weekendwidow's picture

My SD21 uses FBook to deliberately hurt her dad and shun me and my kids. She's such a child. Either use facebook to connect with friends and family whom you otherwise would not, use it for business marketing or grow up. I think Fbook has ruined more relationships. "I unfriend you"....

People tend to read into things too far and get upset. I'm not saying that is what OP is doing, but I have been guilty of that myself and know plenty of others who have done that, too.

Sorry you're hurting and feel neglected...that sucks. Hugs.

Needalifeboat's picture

Yup, I know what you mean. It's just one more crazy way we get our feelings hurt with all the technology we use.
I'm thinking I should just deactivate it.

Thank you, I am feeling neglected all around...I guess the FB thing is just one more to add to the list. It's piling up. Sad

Easylikesundaymornin's picture

Ahhhh the dreaded social media !! What a freakin nightmare !

I have FB but hardly ever gone on it for various stupid reasons. My DF had FB but quickly has realized how utterly stupid it was ~ from old gf bashing him for immature crap he did over 25 years ago. His path not mine.

Mine is more jovial ~ free spirited and funny. I have blocked myself from anyone who wants to reign turmoil in my life ~ life is way to short to have FB to have impact on my life. I have blocked DF's daughter n his ex. The things they both post are either things a disrespectful man would say or the constant sexual connotations. Sd talks about "cuntpunting" someone n ex wife posts pics of her cleavage and mouth. Good god ~ what messages are you sending.

Sounds like your man is walking the fine line ~ acknowledging he is with you and keeping his kids happy with pics of them. You can't make him change n we as woman are way more emotional then men. I honestly find it strange when men are on FB ~ anyone else feel that way ???

It's more natural for a woman to take pics and post then a man.

Needalifeboat's picture

It is strange! There are definitely more women on fb than men. My SO is one of those obsessive FBers. Constantly on there, posts all the time. That's why this is bugging me, because we're clearly left out.
He even posts videos from his family's bday parties and such.

If a stranger looked at his page they would not even realize he lives with 3 other kids that he supposedly cares about.
Not a mention!

Easylikesundaymornin's picture

It's funny lately I have realized that if/when I post to FB ~ I post about what my kids are doing as a family. DF is always working so there are a handful of pics of him n I but they are years old.

We had a falling out with his daughter about 3 or 4 years ago so we have no pics of her. Like she doesn't exist. I don't post any pics of him n I any longer cause I don't want to give SD any ammio for bs. Too many unknown stalkers will read what they want to.

How is your relationship w him ? And him n your kids ??

Needalifeboat's picture

It's up and down. I think that's why the fb thing is bothering me, because it's one more thing on the pile. He's good to my kids, will treat them nicely but constantly nit picks to me about them, meanwhile he's a Disney dad to his own. When his girls are here I may as well just leave the house because it's like I lose him for days at a time. I'm overwhelmed and wondering if this is really how I want to spend my life...having a relationship that is conditional on skid schedule. Not being able to really be a couple unless we are kid free, which isn't often. I'm just feeling blah about everything.

Easylikesundaymornin's picture

So it's do as I say not as I do ~ hypocritical in a sense ??

I find that unfair ! Consistency needs to be all the way around !

You gotta walk the talk

I think your FB issue has more to do with fairness not the FB.

Anon2009's picture

It's a bit unfair of you to want dh to post pics of your kids on fb. You shouldn't have to post pics of his kids on fb if you don't want to. Same applies for him.

Needalifeboat's picture

I see your point here. I like to make everyone feel included, and care about his kids a lot so I like to take pics of them all together. It is unfair to expect him to feel the same way. We are becoming more and more separate families as time goes on, even though before we moved in together we said it would be different. I guess I'm feeling sad that it's going that way because it isn't what I choose. It's being chosen for me.

Needalifeboat's picture

You're right, I need to have a talk with him. I'll keep the FB thing to myself though.
He knows something is off lately and said we'd talk tonight.