Husband hasn't talked to me in two days!
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I was trying to have a conversation with my husband the other day about how Im upset that he still acts like a single parent all the time, and that his son is a spoiled brat. He walked out on my conversation and so I wrote him a letter trying to tell him how I fell and now he hasn't talked to me in two days. I admit I was a alittle harsh in the letter but at the same time I dont regret it because its been feelings that have needed to get off my chest, i.e: his crazy ex wife, his son being spoiled and how he treats my daughter. Anyone ever have this same problem? How would you fix it?
Well without knowing what you
Well without knowing what you said in the letter, it's hard for anyone to suggest anything.
I'm sorry you are going through a hard time and I hope things get better for you
I agree its difficult not
I agree its difficult not knowing what ypu said in the letter but just try a different approach. instaed of being direct try to be indirrect.
It's hard to say what's going
It's hard to say what's going through your husbands mind. He could have mixed feelings. I know my husband also wishes we could all get along.. be the big happy family that he wants... in stepfamilies..It's almost impossible!
Just keep in
Just keep in mind.....sometimes the truth hurts....give him some time to comprehend and take it all in. Go back to him, maybe tomorrow, and ask if you can discuss the letter. As him how he feels about it.
Ohhh yes...the truth hurts
Ohhh yes...the truth hurts and it's a bit of a blow to his male pride. He's sulking! Just let it be for a little while, smile and act as usual, he'll come around the second he gets 'needy' This is one where he'll be ready to see the light once you and he are back in harmony in the bedroom, or bathroom, or anywhere else that catches your imagination. I hate to sound crass here but it's a fact of life and it's part of the journey towards becoming on mutual terms. Every fight is actually a communication, voices flare up, points are yelled out and once feelings calm down a bit then there's room for making up and, believe me...been there...he comes around to my way of thinking. DH and I have had several 'communications' that way! The best advice I can give you is not to take it personally. I told DH one day that i was glad I did not get him pregnant last night, he was really being prissy!
Yeah...he's sulking but it's
Yeah...he's sulking but it's also pure manipulation. He is punishing you.
Yeah...he's sulking but it's
Yeah...he's sulking but it's also pure manipulation. He is punishing you.
You are right boo hoo, which is why I smile and go about business as usual so I am not percieved to be accepting 'punishment. LOL
It honestly was the only way
It honestly was the only way to get my point across to him, because Im tired of hearing excuses all the time and when i try to have an honest conversation with him it turns into him always having to be right. I did apologize to him about having to write the letter and hurting his feelings but I do not regret telling him because it finally got out in the open and i have to say that i can see that he is finally trying to change and make things better. he never wants me to write him a letter like that again and i told him that next time he should just be willing to listen to me and be willing to talk about whats going on instead of walking away.
he does do the not talking to you as a punishment but i just carried on about my normal way until the sulking stopped and he was prepared to have a grown up conversation.
Angelcakes
When I really have issues in
When I really have issues in my marriage, I would have to write it down. Otherwise, my frustration would grow out of control with being interrupted in the middle of a point I was trying to make. NN knows that and respects it. Sometimes it is easier for him to understand once I could get everything out there too.
My guess is that your H felt attacked. You admitted you were harsh and that will put him on the defensive when it comes to his child and parenting style.
Maybe you could take a soft approach and apologize for your WORDING in the letter but ask if he feels you two can discuss it without getting defensive.