A little overwhelming...
Sigh...Feeling AWFUL today. My SD is in a self-injury program at a local behavioral hospital. Since SD was having such a rough time at home with BM and stepdad her mom gave us temp. custody of her 2 weeks ago until we go to court for a more permanant solution. She assured us her insurance would cover the cost of the program she was enrolled in. Unfortunately, until we get permanant custody, we're still paying her $800 a month for a child that is actually in our custody. We were completely NOT financially prepared for this and now the hospital is harassing me about paying her weekly bill when I pick her up. I've tried to explain to them that the insurance is her step-fathers and that legally her mom is responsible for all health care costs per CO. If I had the money, I wouldn't have a problem paying for it, but we've just taken on an extra mouth to feed, paid for her school registration, and bought school supplies. BM does not want to discuss finances because it's "awkward". I asked the hospital for a monthly payment plan, but they insist on paying at least half of the $500 a week until she is discharged. The registration woman made me feel like such an awful person because I could only afford a $20 good faith payment at the moment. To add to all this,I found out my school loan was cut in half so I need to find a way to pay for the rest of my last semester of nursing school. Just feeling extremely overwhelmed and can't wait until I graduate and double our income.
BM is playing you ALL for
BM is playing you ALL for everything...no $h1t it's awkard, it's bass akwards if you ask me!! DH really, and I mean REALLY needs to stop paying child support. There might be a partial payment due to her because of the handover but next month you should have an extra $800! Then BM will have to begin paying YOU child support! That would help get the hospital off your back. It's a lot of stress, we paid child support for months even after we had the kids but when our expenditure greatly increased he put a stop to it.
BM here is severely disturbed, borderline personality disorder and she lives in an altered state of reality from the rest of us. Problems with our girl too, cutting, drinking, smoking weed, boys, and girls now, and generally a pain in the ass but she's paying the price for it all now, at a juvenile detention center. Ohh and THEY will want child support from us too! BM has NEVER paid a cent in support, DH says he will pursue her for child support if that happens.
You'll make it, you sound like a good person and your heart is in the right place...all this stress will have it's payoffs in later years...trust me on this one!
Can you just stop paying
Can you just stop paying child support? I thought it has to be court ordered otherwise it is against the law. My DH tried talking with BM today and mentioned the situation and that he's not sure how we can afford the program because we're broke at this point. Her response: "yeah, i know the feeling" as she goes back into her nice wealthy suburban home. I find it fair at this point for her to give us $400 back since SS still lives with her (until we can get a legal change in the CS order). SD needs this program and deserves to have that money for her needs just as much as SS does. I have no problem with CS, but when things like this happen, it really is unfortunate how some people handle the situation. The honest thing to do would be to at least give us half back. DH is going to contact a lawyer next week to get the ball rolling on a permanant custody agreement. We'll have to take out loans if that's what it takes. I just want the best for SD, she's a sweet kid (as much as a 14yo can be
)and we've always had a close relationship. Thanks for the kind words. Sorry to hear about your SD. Maybe Juvy is a necessary evil and will be a wake up call. You just never know with teens.
Just one of those days...