Narcissism and divorced parents
Forums:
Any chance there's a link between narcissism and divorces with kids/single parents? My guess is a lot (not all) of these divorced parents have high narcissistic tendencies. It's all about them and anyone who dare voice their own needs, or god forbid a different opinion about something, is threatened, smeared, or discarded. Yes? No?
I've read somewhere that
I've read somewhere that personality disorders are more common among people who are divorced. In my case, BM is undiagnosed BPD with narcissistic tendencies (as speculated, but again, not diagnosed, by several counselors I've worked with).
That said, my MIL (who was not divorced), seems to have narcissistic tendencies.
Makes sense that narcissists
Makes sense that narcissists are likely to be divorced, as they can't maintain genuine relationships. And perhaps (speculation) narcissists are more likely to have kids in failing relationships, as they want someone to give them unconditional supply.
But wouldn't say that being divorced indicates narcissism.
true for 3/3 divorces here
Yeah, my mom was BPD, and I sure didnt' see it as a kid. Thought the divorce was all my dad's fault (some serious PAS I had to find my way out of). My ex self-diagnosed himself as a narcissist and then got diagnosed as bi-polar, so one? both? But yeah, I couldn't handle all the suicide threats to control behavior, especially after he did it in front of our kid. And the BM of my skids told me she had PTSD, but given her intense manipulations, victim complex, screwed view of reality, unpredictable anger, etc. I'm guessing she might have BPD like my mom.
Considering that in the UK
Considering that in the UK where I live, 42% of marriages end in divorce, that's an awful lot of narcissists! Including a lot of us here. Having said that, I have always referred to my husband's exW as NPD BM.
What I meant to say was those
What I meant to say was those who are divorced with children who immediately seek another relationship after another relationship after another. If that one relationship fails then they immediately seek another after that. I am meaning those who monkey branch from one serious relationship to another almost instantly when there are children involved. They do not seem to take any time to work on themselves or reflect what went wrong in the relationships (s). They also do not grieve the previous relationship(s). It is onto the next and with children involved this seems particulalry selfish and concerning. Sorry for the confusion.
It could be narcissism.
It could be narcissism. However, it could very well be that they aren't looking for love but instead looking for help. With so many expectations that these people place on their new partners, that could very well be the reason. I truly believe my ex thinks there is a quality woman out in the world willing to help him financially support and enable his lazy, selfish, disrespectful adult kids. What I don't think he gets is that a quality woman is going to be turned off once she realizes he is incapable of raising quality kids to be independent quality adults.
My cousin just broke up with
My cousin just broke up with a guy who wanted it all. What he meant was a woman to live with him and help with the bills and his kids. His kids are school aged and hers are adults. She did not want to raise another set of kids, plus these kids were from two different HCBM's. He also had another older kid in college from another BM. Three different Baby Mama's! This guy didn't slow down and figure things out, just kept moving on and procreating.
Evil ill people are more
Evil ill people are more likely to end up divorced than good people of quality.
Not sure there are any major studies that provide viable data, but it makes sense.
Too bad there is no licensing requirement for these toxic idiots to breed. So many kids could be saved from being polluted by the toxic gene pools of these evil idiots.
I do agree that divorcees
I do agree that divorcees with children who move quickly from relationship to relationship are more likely to be narcissistic especially if they have had more than one failed relationship under their belt that their children were involved with.
My ex mother in law is a
My ex mother in law is a narcissist but still married - for ‘status’. Divorce would have resulted in shame back then, didn’t stop her from having affairs though. - then when various daughters in law came and went over the years, she would happily point out minor flaws.
I know narcissists are ‘calculating’ but I wonder if anyone has done any reasearch to see if female narcissists are more calculating????
My brother's MIL is just like
My brother's MIL is just like this. Her first marriage to my SIL's father failed when my SIL was 2yo and her elder sister was 4yo. She remarried when my SIL was about 4. She has been married to her second husband for nearly 50 years and has been entirely miserable just about the whole time. She will move perodically for some bullshit medical condition leaving her DH behind. He will invariably follow her though she would much prefer that he did not. She won't divorce him because he is loaaaadddeddd and she "diserves" his money and has earned his resources. He is heir to a very large real estate fortune and is the chairman of the family trust. His monthly checks from the trusts are in excess of $50K, combined with his own career as a highly compensated aerospace engineer.
It saddens me that my brother has ended up with an only slightly better version of what his FIL has sufferred through.
It is sad that good people sometimes shackle themselves to these types of nasty people.
My mother has been married
My mother has been married and divorced twice and was also in one other long term relationship where she was engaged but never married. All of these relationships happened while she was raising us. I believe my mother is either a narcissist or BPD with sociopathic tendencies.